World of Expression

我♥大自然 ^_^

2010-08-29T21:21:00.010+08:00

我超爱大自然：

---♥辽阔的草原♥---

---♥一望无际的蓝海♥---

当然，有烦恼时，我会看看天空（因为哪里都可以看到），会让我平静下来。。。

---♥蓝天白云♥---

今天驾车去上班时又看见天上有飞机飞过。。。还是很喜欢仰望天空。。。尤其是当飞机飞过的那一片刻，我会一直望着它，直到看不到为止。。。

那么喜欢望着天空上的飞机飞行，另一个原因是因为现在都无法出国，就唯有望着飞行着的飞机，就好像带着我一同飞出去，飞到异地。。。而且，上次第一次乘坐飞机让我发现，人类真的很渺小。。。当飞机在天空中，从窗口往下望，起初会望到地面上的屋子、汽车、道路等都逐渐变小，最后渺小到什么都看不见，在云端里面。。。

当一个人很烦恼，很不开心，看不开，对所有事情都不满意时，接触大自然是一个满有效的疗伤方法。。。所以我喜欢到处走，到处参观。。。不是说一定要逛街、看电影，有时候和大自然融入一块，拍很多美丽的照片，也是一种享受，你懂吗？

远距离恋爱....♥ⓛⓞⓥⓔ♥

2010-08-16T02:56:00.010+08:00

对于远距离的恋爱，我真的没有什么信心。。。不管是否因为听别人的故事或经历，对我来说，一点安全感都没有。就算现在科技发达，可以透过网上每天与对方联系，或者在skype看见对方，但是比起真真实实的在身边，是有差别的。

曾经看过一个文章写道，远距离的恋爱很可能发生婚外情或者出现第三者，其中一个原因是当你遇到困难时，最需要有人在身边时，在身边的并不是你的另一半，而是另一个人，最最最容易发生感情出轨的事件。所以，今天在网上查询一些关于这方面的星座分析。。。

白羊座 vs 天秤座

1. “星座之远距离恋爱失败排行榜”

第一名金牛座

第二名天蝎座

第三名天秤座：天秤座的朋友是很有异性缘的，他们一般总不会缺乏追求者仰慕者，属于桃花带电体。你要是放这样一个桃花带电体的恋人孤身在遥远的城市，处于你众多情敌的包围中，而和你谈远距离的恋爱，实在是比较危险的一件事情。天秤座人又是特别怕寂寞、害怕孤独的一类人。所以最终，你电话或邮件里再多的情话，在天秤的心中衡量一下，总抵不上身边人实质性的陪伴和付出。

第四名白羊座：白羊座的朋友性子比较急，没啥耐性，什么事情都希望能赶快看到个结果。他们喜欢感受强烈的火辣辣的爱情，高温高热可以烧昏头脑的那种。可是远距离的恋情，总是让人分离，总是让人等待，操作起来如同小火慢炖，把他们的胃口一直吊在半空中，上不了也下不去，不知道什么时候是个头。所以，一般白羊座的朋友们是很难耐心地长期忍受远距离恋爱的。

2. “12星座远距离恋爱真爱指数考验”

当恋爱中的另一半说：亲爱的，我要去美国了……

白羊座：“去多久？”“去三年那么久？”“那分手吧！” 其实不是说白羊座寡情，而是对于他们来说恋爱就是要朝夕相处，如果相隔异地，只能是“长痛不如短痛”，不如就这样分手，以后大家还是朋友。对于白羊来说，他们真的很难看到以后，他们只会想现在，看眼前，如果眼前对他们来说是没有希望的，那也就会立刻行动起来，保护自己。在爱情上，白羊是相当干脆的，不喜拖泥带水，属于行动派，要求立见真章。他们最不能忍受相思之苦。

天秤座：“你可不可以留下来？”“算了，你去吧，我等你。”　　天秤座就是这样犹豫不决，他们不知道自己究竟要什么，有时他们觉得自己可以等到天荒地老，有时他们觉得这样好浪费时间。在分开的日子里，他们会变得歇斯底里，会反复的思考、衡量你们的感情价值。不要以为天秤座平日里浪漫，就会谈起“柏拉图式的恋爱”，其实天秤座也很现实，当他们用他们的秤子衡量准确之后，他们会平静的和你分手。

3. “12星座远距离的恋爱”

白羊座
个性火爆直爽的白羊座与恋人分隔两地时，白天与朋友在喧闹中度过还不会觉得特别难过，但安静的的夜晚来临时，强烈的孤独感便会侵袭全身。煲电话、聊网络联系终究无法弥补可以触摸情人的真实与甜蜜。为了持续和巩固爱情白羊座常常会两地跑动，争取多见见对方。虽然白羊无法保证能持续多久，但时间越长就越觉得有成就感。

天秤座
天秤座想想法很容易改变，尤其在缺少恋人在身边的日子中，知心朋友就成了天秤座的情感寄。他们一面和朋友们快快乐乐的生活，一面对自己的爱情充满了美好的幻想。最喜欢的莫过于去购物狂街泡吧消磨时间，把选购的物品寄给远方的爱人，希望得到对方的赞美和喜爱。但这份爱能保持多久我们就不得而知了。

就算还有很多途径可以联络。。。我还是需要真实的陪伴。。。我，很不独立吗？

就是喜欢每天见面。。。就是要时时刻刻都在身边。。。

柴米油盐酱醋茶 ♬♬♬

2010-08-08T00:54:00.004+08:00

能不能像这首歌那样，简单长久。。。
往往因为习惯而忽略了珍惜。。。珍惜听似、说似简单，有多少的人无时无刻都在珍惜身边的人、事或物？
♥---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------♥
小时候你想要什么
我要一台大大蓝色的飞机
带我环游世界
到地球每一个角落
在蓝天白云中穿梭
而长大以后我想要什么
我要一台小小红色答录机
和你一起录下
喂我们现在不在家
蓝色变成红色因为你
柴米油盐酱醋茶
一点一滴都是幸福在发芽
月儿弯弯爱的傻
有了你什么都不差
小时候你想要什么
我要一台大大蓝色的飞机
带我环游世界
到地球每一个角落
在蓝天白云中穿梭
哦长大以后我想要什么
我要一台小小红色答录机
和你一起录下
喂我们现在不在家
蓝色变成红色因为你
柴米油盐酱醋茶
一点一滴都是幸福在发芽
月儿弯弯爱的傻
有了你什么都不差
给你快乐无论白天黑夜
握紧双手就算刮风下雨
我就是要你
要你待在我身边
保护你直到永远
柴米油盐酱醋茶
一点一滴都是幸福在发芽
月儿弯弯爱的傻
有了你什么都不差
月儿弯弯爱的傻
没有一个理由
活的那么复杂
♥---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------♥

♥爱，没有因为所以。。。♥

2010-08-04T16:22:00.018+08:00

很喜欢以下类型的图片，所以就有感而发。。。

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

不知道什么时候开始，更不知道什么时候对彼此的感情逐渐增长。。。他说，他开始慢慢留意我，他开始觉得我很可爱，很想知道关于我的事情。。。他觉得我单纯（不好听应该就是笨吧？！）、善良（可能那时还没了解我？！），但是看样子应该蛮凶的学长。。。

一开始，我们在一起，应该好像学生所谓的 puppy love（这只是我的感觉），当然从没有这样想过。他说和我在一起后，他就认定我是他所要找的、所要一起生活的女子。当时的他和现在的他不同，所以我是他要找的女子这番话，当然不是在中学时候告诉我。以前他很安静，他跟我在一起时，他不多说话，跟朋友就很多话说；当然，我也一样。经过了几个月在一起的相处，包括放学一起走去候车亭、陪我走路回家、一起策划camp和其他活动、一起走路去补习，还有唯一的一次出去看电影，都一一记在心中。但是，由于大人的思想影响了我对他做出残酷的决定。我们也因此面临到考验。。。

我们就在毕业后的几年面对了人生很多的问题，我们只有偶尔在msn或发短讯慰问对方。当他很想念我时，他会说“很想念你”，但当时的我却以为他只是随口说说，以为他是口花花，没给任何回应。当然，我面对很多不开心的事情，偶尔上网遇见他，就会向他述说，他当然是一个很好的听众，永远都可以安慰鼓励我，“加油，明天会更好！”“相信自己，你是最好的！你可以的！”
倘若说这几年一点都没有想念他，那是骗人的。交了很多新朋友，认识人的圈子都变大了，也因为很少联系，我以为他完全把我放下了，重新过自己的生活。也因为这样，我有了一个男朋友。对他的打击，实在很大。直到我要出国念书，他也不敢来送机，只是上机前一晚，msn上叮嘱我要小心，要好好照顾自己，不要冷到。。。他说了“一路顺风”就挂线了。。。那一夜的他，过的很伤心，很舍不得，因为他怕我出国后就不回来了，以后都见不到我，他要对我说的话，也永远无法说出口。

我后来才知道，原来他一直都没有女朋友，一直都没有忘记我。应该是天意吧，让我有机会再次与他见面，而且见面地点还是我们初恋时的地方 --- 中学。也让我知道一直以来收在他内心深处的话，原来，他一直默默的在等我。为什么？我觉得很惊讶，更觉得很开心、窝心。

结果，找回以前的感觉。。。不应该说找回，见面后才发现原来这种感觉不曾消失。。。

这一次的在一起和以前不同。。。感觉加深了，我们成熟了，多话说了，距离比以前靠近了。他第一次下厨煮他拿手的意大利面和蘑菇汤，第一次陪我去唱K（他说他不曾去唱K，因为他不会唱）。第二次的在一起，让我发现到一些以前都不知道的事情。。。。。

1. 他可以很迁就我，他真的可以做到“不平等条约 --- 第一条是：老婆永远是对的。第二

条是：如果真的是老婆错了，参考第一”。有时候明明是我错，或者我知道不是他的错，但是他都会迁就我。。。有时候也会觉得他很无辜，所以就更加疼他。

2. 就算再辛苦再累，他也愿意付出，只要能够和我在一起，只要是为了我。

3. 他很体谅女生每个月经期的腰酸背痛和情绪不稳。他还会每次帮我按摩，因为很酸痛。更厉害的是，他记得我什么时候，上个月几号period，我每次都要问他。

4. 他不会说甜言蜜语，但是每次都会说“老婆，我爱你”。

5. 他会陪我逛街、唱K，带我去吃我喜欢吃的。他会存钱买我喜欢的，带我去我要去的地方。

6. 我不开心或生气，他会唱歌给我听，虽然他知道他不擅长。

6. 他说，不管去哪里都会带我去，不会丢下我。

7. 他每次都会说我不胖，就算以后我肥了，他也还会一样爱我。

8. 他会给我发泄，每次都给我咬，给我捏。。。

他的EQ真的很高，只有我，每次都发脾气，生气。。。但是，他都很有耐心的陪在我身边。因为他说，他不会再放手，要牵紧我的手。

所以，他常常说我是小孩子，小女孩。。。但是很可爱。。。发脾气时也是很“口爱”。。。

和他在一起，有时候很生气，有时候很开心，有时候很失望。。。但是，这就是人生的过程。。。只要我们手牵手，不放弃。。。

现在只想和他过着简简单单的生活，只要能在一起，应该就是幸福了吧。。。只要和他在一起，在哪里都不怕。。。

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

说了再见 T__T

2010-07-30T21:14:00.003+08:00

好伤心的一首歌。。。。今天才知道原来是一部电影“海洋天堂’的主题曲，而且该电影还有李连杰、桂伦美。。。很想看这部电影。。。应该很伤心，感动的。。。。

In My Head...\^o^/

2010-07-30T20:19:00.001+08:00

♥♥♥♥♥ Love this song♥♥♥♥♥

2010-07-29T15:26:00.002+08:00

Hahaha....finally....

终于换了一个全新面貌。。。好喜欢哦。。。

每次看别人的blog都觉得很羡慕，为什么可以这么美，这么多样化。。。好像很容易办到，但是我就不会。。。对电脑的意识还是很差。。。还好有人教我可以在网上查询关于这方面的资料。。。这只是最初步的改革。。。

想问，要如何把音乐加入我的blog里？？之前是我姐姐教我弄的，现在不怎么会了。。。有什么简单的方法可以提供给我吗？谢谢。。。^^

短发。。。

2010-04-27T01:55:00.003+08:00

今天，终于鼓起勇气见了一头短发。。。真不敢相信，9年的长发，我一直都不舍得剪，可是因为天气很炎热，再加上我之前剪的水母发型已经不美了，要等一半不长不短的头发长到和之前一样，要等很久。。。所以反正一半的头发都短了，就索性一次过，剪了算了。

我决定剪之前很矛盾，因为我知道我一定会不舍得我的长发，而且我也知道长发比较美，所以一直一直三心两意。。。一方面一直在网上找看有没有美丽的短发发型。。。最后决定把这个发型的决定交给发型师。。。

到了理发店，那店的负责人竟然安排一个泰国人帮我剪头发。一看不知道他是泰国人，我还跟他说中文，哪里知道，他一开口就说“what kind of hairstyle you wanna cut?”。。。他不会说中文，就只好跟他以英文交谈。一开始，我很怕他不明白我要的发型效果，但是还好，他剪出来的效果我还能接受。他真的很温柔咯，很小心翼翼的帮我剪每一根头发，也因为酱，我差点睡着。。。而且，他一直跟我解释他现在是怎么剪，会是什么效果。很好叻。。。

还好剪出来的发型我觉得还不错，不会看到脸大。。。我是可以和他沟通的！！！而且，他剪出来的发型，其实我之前找发型资料时，有种莫名的预感，一直联想到我剪的发型会是大概酱的。。。^^

某某人说，我是胆小鬼，因为不敢尝试剪短头发。。。*嘟嘴*
我只是不舍得我的长发。。。
我是爱惜长发的小公主。。。哼！

在我结婚的时候，我一定要把头发再次流长。。。一定要是长发新娘~~~♥

我是小公主？

2010-04-26T01:42:00.002+08:00

他常说，我是

小公主/小女孩
坏蛋的小公主/小女孩
可爱的小公主/小女孩
爱发脾气的小公主/小女孩
爱生气的小公主/小女孩
很像小孩子的小公主/小女孩

听到不知道是开心还是生气。。。当然我也知道他说的都是真的。。确实，我很容易就生气不爽发脾气，可是只是对他比较容易。。。可能他身份跟别人不一样咯。。

我很谢谢他对我的包容和忍耐。。。我每次不开心或生气，他都会主动道歉，我知道他很疼我，所以我有告诉自己，别人对你的好不是理所当然的，要珍惜，不能过分，不能滥用。。。在我们的世界里，我真的觉得自己像小公主/小女孩，可以依靠他，可以信任他，可以撒娇，可以“欺负”他（当我不开心时，因为可以咬他）。。。还有我有绝招，可以令他听话。。。嘻嘻。。不过不用出绝招，他都会听话的。。。

我爱你~谢谢你~

Memories...

2010-01-20T22:54:00.002+08:00

suddenly think of many past memories....all comes in my mind....i felt things changes very fast and seems like sometimes not under my control...

but what i learned is NEVER regret of what you have decided....THINK before act...this is the most important thing that we need to know in our life...

I told my friends, people do have memories and memory is a good thing. We should appreciate when we still remember the past but not felt sad about it. Sometimes rewind our memory in the past might be a good thing, at least it might teach us something with our experiences...

memories...memories....can't really know whether is our friend or not....

世界末日？？？！！！！

2010-01-02T14:50:00.002+08:00

今天在网上看新闻时，发现了这个。。。

2010年大焦點

2010年的世界，貧窮暫時放在一邊，戰爭已經不算甚麼。

全球的焦點，是在那2度C。

2度C，是地球溫度上升的上限。哥本哈根氣候變遷大會提醒說，地球溫度上升必須控制在2度C以下。

只要超過2度C，北極冰帽就會消失，海水溫度上升，海洋生物面臨死亡，農作物受干旱破壞，熱浪與森林大火席捲各地，小島國家被海水淹沒。

人類將面對一場生存浩劫。

难道这么快就要面对世界末日了吗？很恐怖似的。。。还有很多事情还没做，如果世界末日这么快来临，怎么办？

人类会反省吗？不知过了多少年，一直被呼吁爱惜地球，不知有多少广告，多少歌手，多少歌曲，多少报道要人类一同保护我们的地球。。。可是，到底有多少人在乎？多少人醒觉呢？

很讨厌某某人口口声声说要环保，可是他们的同种族朋友却到处焚烧垃圾，树叶。。。是不是没事做找事来做？

我们要学习环保了。。。。要不然地球真的没救了！！！

讨厌自己EQ低...

2009-10-04T21:40:00.004+08:00

以前我不会分辨IQ及EQ，现在会了！

IQ：Intelligence quotient的简写，也就是测量个人的智商/聪明度
"Abbreviation for intelligence quotient, an attempt to measure the intelligence of someone. " (Quoted from Medicine Net,1999)

EQ：Emotional quotient的简写，也就是测量个人的情绪管理
"Emotional Intelligence, or EI, describes an ability or capacity to perceive, assess, and manage the emotions of one's self, and of others. Our EQ, or Emotional Quotient, is how one measures Emotional Intelligence." (Quoted from Institute of Health and Human Potential,2009)

之所以这样，EQ对每一个人来说都很重要。去面试时，有些公司（尤其是大公司）会给来面试的一份问卷，测试个人的EQ。

我一直都不知道自己的EQ是这么的低，因为之前都不明白什么是EQ。之所以知道，是回想起我时不时都生气，发脾气，不开心或不爽就会摆在脸上，周围的人要不知道我不爽都难！我就是一个很好EQ低的模范。。。

我最近才发现，原来要成功的控制自己的情绪很难，而且若EQ高，也就是情绪管理得很好，做起事来也会事半功倍。所以不管一个人有多聪明，IQ有多高，若EQ不好，想要成功，也需磨炼好一段日子才能踏上青云吧！

IQ不高，我不觉得可悲，反而EQ低的我才觉得可怜 --- 我就是这个人，IQ中等，EQ却。。。唉！在上一间公司工作时，我的好朋友曾经问过我，为什么有时候我不爽主任可以摆在脸上酱明显，我以为是他察觉错了，现在想起来，又好像是。。。嘻嘻！ =.='' 所以就说，我EQ不好，好想克服这个叻！！但是有时候，不爽就是不爽，我又不是双面人，所以我真得很佩服那些双面人，其实现在觉得我们不能说他们不好，反而是厉害，因为EQ超高！我知道在社会里生存是很需要EQ。。。好矛盾哦！！！

双面人 = EQ高 or
双面人 = IQ + EQ高

我好混乱哦！ @.@

批评一定是好的吗？

2009-09-21T20:45:00.002+08:00

以前我听人说，有批评才有进步，自己也这么认为，所以批评一向来对我来说都不是坏事，只是有些时候自己接受不了，但很快就会雨过天晴。可是，批评真的是一件好事吗？

刚刚听了某人对某人的批评，觉得很心痛，不开心，原本一整天的好心情也给搞砸了。我讨厌别人批评我身边的人，尤其是对我来说是重要的人。他们批评这些人，就如批评着我，真的很不开心！为什么好端端的一个人，要被别人批评？他完全没有做错事，可能在某人的眼里就是看他不顺眼，或对他有偏见。为什么？？？？？有批评才有进步？？？不是所有的时候都用得着。

什么我开心就好？想清楚就好？结果换来的，还是批评！！！

鼓励的话真的很难说吗？就算不要鼓励，也别尽量的挖苦别人好吗？不是每个人都能忍受批评。。。

父亲节快乐

2009-06-21T12:02:00.004+08:00

今天没什么特别庆祝。。。只是昨天去了姑姑家一起吃饭。。。

我的父亲大人。。。

其实与一般的父亲没什么不一样，都是努力赚钱养大我们五个瓜的老爸。。。以前总是不了解老爸，干嘛这个不允许，那个不可以，严肃，带点害怕的感觉。。。现在长大了，很多事情都明白了，不再害怕，发而很想什么事情都告诉他（也可能妈妈不在，爸爸就像是父兼母职的）。。。我的爸爸总是该严肃时，他可以很够力严肃，但某些时候他还是会陪我们一起傻，一起玩。。。也许这些以前都不曾发现吧，愈长大就愈觉得了解爸爸的心情。。。

其实，一直以来爸爸一个人养活我们已经是个不容易的事，还有我们的学费，生活费。。。老爸，你很棒！！！

爸爸年纪一年比一年大，其实他有跟我说过，他有意退休或转行，不开车行了。。。可是不知道可以做什么，经济又酱。。。而且听爸爸常提起美国，他真的很喜欢那个地方，喜欢那里的天气，那里的生活（尤其是在那里joging），他希望过去生活和赚钱。。。我希望爸爸能够做自己喜欢或想过的生活。。。现在只剩我弟弟还在念书，所以他的负担其实没那么大了。。。我就没用咯，又失业了。。。唉~~~

我希望以后能够让爸爸享福。。。预祝我们兄弟姐妹们成功吧！

提及爸爸，又想到妈妈。。。其实那天辞职后，心情超差，很想念妈妈，很想跟她诉苦，很想抱抱。。。可是还好某人在身边陪着我。。。谢谢他！

最后，当然要祝全天下的父亲 -----〉父情节快乐！要健康哦~~~

终于。。。18/6/2009

2009-06-19T14:30:00.007+08:00

又一天的崩溃。。。又哭了。。。

终于。。离开了那间公司，顿时有松了一口气，但过后就开始矛盾的伤心，失望，无助起来。。。

期间发生了一些事情。。。

上个星期四，6月11日，放工后，“老”同事开会，当然包括我，除了刚加入公司的同事。我还以为是有什么大事，也根本没有预兆，这个会议是因为我而开的。好像我很大牌？？才没有。。。因为在这之前，我考虑离开公司的想法告诉了一个我觉得可以信任的同事，因为不论在什么时候，她都很帮我的忙，很谢谢她。我就只是说说，还没有正式的打算，她听了，可能害怕我一个人乱乱想（因为自从Christine走了，我就更压力了），她就告诉了另一位同事，这位同事算是蛮有说服力的。于是这位很有说服力的同事就找我谈，问我是不是很压力，是不是有什么问题，有问题就要说出来，一起去面对/克服，甚至可以一起找 manager谈。可是，我真的说不出，我只觉得很压力，sponsors又还没找到，我也不想的，我也尽力的找了，我害怕我能力不足，辜负了大家。。。至于以前对manager的不满，也已经不是问题了，也不觉得是一个足以令我辞职的一个main point！但，她就是以只要我说出问题，我真的真的不知道。。她还叫我回去想好好问题，一起跟manager说，我已经说了，就算让我面对着 manager，我也说不出问题在哪，也许是我自己没信心的问题。怎么知道，就酱，manager知道了，所以就开会咯！

他们认为我不敢说出问题，他们要帮我解决问题，好让我有信心的继续与他们一起奋斗。他们的好意，我真的知道。可是这样的开会，即帮不到我重拾信心，反而令我更伤心，更想立刻离开，令我更觉得自己多么的差，连问题在哪里都不知道。他们就酱，一整个会议就要我说话，说出问题，天啊！！！那时的我，就只想快快结束，快快离开，因为很突然，没想到我告诉同事兼朋友我的想法，结果却让manager知道了。。更加没有心理准备，感觉像被问话，超不喜欢这样的感觉，已经不止一次了，全部人都在等我开口，可是我却不知道要说些什么。。。有好几次我都很想辞职，只是都没有实行，我都重新尝试努力投入工作，寻找 sponsors，做我应该做的，可是，他们却觉得我没有尽力。。。可是我很想告诉他们，我真的有！也许我的能力有限，或还达不到他们理想的。。一次次的重新振作，但在别人的眼中却看不到，是我的问题吧??!!还有，想强调，我真的知道他们为了我开这个会，出发点真的是为我好，要我重拾信心，当然他们也担心唯一的promotion也走了。。。但是，每个人能接受事情的程度不同，当晚，我真的只会哭，也不知该说什么好。。。我真的第一次觉得被伤害了。。。被摆上抬的感觉。。。（再次强调，他们的出发点是好的，只是我本人接受不了，现在好很多了）

2009年6月18日，一早回到公司，manager就叫我进去，跟我谈最近如何。。。因为上星期五老板从香港来到公司，了解我们最近如何，特别担心我 ---promotion，因为只剩一个人的我，又没什么sponsor reply我或给我好消息。。。manager一直问我，没有进展怎样？还是同样的，他们跟我开会了，我也尽量去改了，call sponsors的方式也改进了，他们给的suggestions也蛮有用。。。我真的有要做好接下来的show的心，可是她又说她看不到，她不觉得，因为没有sponsors是有好消息的。。。其实有几个是蛮有机会谈到的，可是当然需要时间，她却认为现在没有result，感觉我没有做好我的本分（她还要用婉转的方式来带出），我也不加以解释，我只是点头，说我会尽力。我真得很伤心，因为原来我的努力使不被认同，没被看到，也许她认为我没做好本分吧！manager说了很久，一直问我怎样，感觉她是在逼我自己说我要辞职，我没有心做了。。。我可以怎样，她又说也要跟香港交待，就好像等着我那句话。。。感觉心好痛，曾经被认同，为何突然会这样，我改变着，但是她这样的逼法，虽然我知道，但还是要让自己说出，“哦，我是没有心做了，我辞职吧！”也许现实真的那样残酷，我还没适应，不管对事或对人。。。感觉上，当他们很需要你的时候，何以竟不需要你了的差别，是那么的大。就酱，我终于忍不住哭了。。。但只有一下下，不想在她面前哭，她说祝我找到我要做的工（radio station)。。。我也没有提交辞职信，也没有跟其他同事交待和说再见就走了。。。我不舍得我的同事。。。他们真的不错。。。

离开公司后，去厕所，哭了。。。原来我真的是那么弱，在改进着的时候，当觉得自己开始有进步了，有回一点点的信心和心去做的时候，有一次，也是最后一次，被打倒了。。。为什么？她可以用心的去开一个会议来挽回我的自信，对公司的热诚，也可以一下的把我推下去,觉得我“无药可救”?我不知道这是她自己的意思，还是老板也是这么想。。我是多么的欣赏老板，也曾经因为想到会辜负老板而继续做下去。。。老板也曾经告诉过我，这间公司要的就是新人可以学习，可以创新，要我勇于尝试。。。我也因为酱，所有ideas也更加大胆的去想，怎么知道，到头来，也是因为我还在学习，她就说看不到我的努力。。。难道要每天加班到很夜，生病不请病假，健康越来越差才叫看到我的努力？我真的不知我的离开是对还是错，也许我的能力还不在我想象中的那么好。。。这次的打击，真的令我觉得“很失败”。。离开前，我还托manager告诉老板，“对不起。。。你是个好老板！”

就这样。。。昨天也哭了一整天，眼睛也肿了。。。头疼。。。闭上眼睛就想到同事。。。

伤心的一个星期。。。

2009-05-09T13:49:00.002+08:00

其实一早就知道我的partner，Christine 会离开公司，可是依依不舍的感觉还是隐藏不了，还是涌上心头，眼泪也不听话的开始流着。。。

还以为我会很坚强，还以为我能忍下，怎知在星期四（7/5) 的早上，她交了辞职信，manager就叫我进去，问我如何，日后剩我一人，我可以吗？一开始，她就告诉我，Christine要离开了。一听到，眼泪就很不听话的往下掉，不是一滴滴，是一串串。。。不停的流着。。。我没有怪Christine，只是不舍得，我们曾经面对过很多困难，面对了两场events，就觉得虽然人手不足，只要我们两人都一起加油，接下来的困难，events，都不是问题，而且是那么的有信心。。。可能就觉得我们的配合度很好，曾经是同学的我们，虽然之前不是很熟，但现在的我们，可以说是绝对组合。。。

她要离开，我是万分的不愿意，万分的伤心，但是有更好的路在等着她，我只好支持她的选择，我还按着自己的不舍得，告诉她，“若你真的决定要走了，就快点走，那里的机会在等你！”叫她走，当然也知道现在自己的公司的问题，也不愿她失去更好的机会。。。

回归在manager房里，我就只好说，我能怎样，就努力的做。Manager也怕我会承受不住压力而离开，她问我，我会不会又突然给她信，我犹豫了一下，虽然之前是的确有想过，而且是很想的那种，但现在，若我走了，不知公司其他同事会如何，因为promotion在我们的公司，真的蛮重要，promotion做不好，很可能整个event都不好。

所以，哭也因为压力很大，突然觉得肩膀重了很多，头也很重，所以这几天头超级痛，很久没试过了，都只有发烧时才会有的头痛，现在几乎每天至少有几小时是跟着我的。。。

我真的觉得身体越来越累，越来越弱。。。很压力啊。。。。！！！！！！！！！！

希望Christine在新的环境，会有更好，更突破的发展。。。

希望我能够战胜自己，战胜压力，战胜那女人!!!!!

希望头不要痛，能够睡好。。。现在我连睡觉都不能睡好，每次都想到/梦到工作，一大堆的工作，做梦也是在想proposal。。。我要睡好！！！！！！

在公司的我。。。晕~~~

2009-03-02T13:19:00.000+08:00

同事们都在会议室里吃午餐，剩我还在对着电脑，当然不是这么勤劳，突然想到很久没update blog了。。。而且今天的我，有点晕晕的，blur blur。。。不想参与他们的话题。。。不是他们和我不好，可能我就是酱咯，迟点会好点的。。。

一早的会议，其实并不是很压力，只是可能还不习惯after weekend再回来上班的日子吧，一早就晕晕酱。。。觉得有点累，没心情，又冷，头有点痛。。。仿佛要生病，“懒人病”？？我也不知道。。。每每都会有一种感觉，“我不想上班！”，但我知道不可能。。所以每次都只是想想就好，也更享受没上班时/放工后可以回家的感觉。。。真的每天都只是期待回到家，躺在自己的床上，什么都不想做，不想想。。。我的床就是我的天堂。。。

上班，真的不一样，真得很不愿意。。。可能我需要时间去适应，希望我快点适应到。。。其实这份工作是不错，只是我还想上课的日子，无忧无虑，顶多是考试，功课压力。。。

天啊！今天要快点放工，放工时间赶快来吧,很期待，很累，很头晕，很想睡觉！！！！！我要回家！

20 February 09, 惊喜的早上。。。

2009-02-20T14:52:00.000+08:00

昨晚又很迟睡，所以今天睡到十一点才起床。起床不久，手机响了，赶快接电话，因为最近都在等待申请工作的消息。。。结果，有种感觉就是“黄天不负有心人”，终于给我等到了。。。等这通电话，像是等了几十年，颈都长了。。。是其中一间去interview了，等着回复的公司，做event的，所以还算是我要做的其中一份工。她说会send offer letter给我via email，若没收到，就打给她。她说星期一上班。

由于太高兴，我跟一些朋友说了，也跟两位姐姐讲了，分享喜悦嘛。。。分享后，竟然有种害怕的感觉。。。

1. 担心。。毕竟是我第一份工作，真的要踏进工作人士阶层。。。人生一大改变。。。不知我会不会又blur blur，让同事头痛。。。不知往后和同事相处会如何，因为人事关系最复杂了，最好一切顺利，不想被人误为“虚假”。。。我记得曾经有位朋友告诉我（现在已是其中一位最要好的朋友），以前她觉得我的人很假，哪有酱好的人，都不会生气，都不会不爽，每次帮人这个，那个，所以她以前不怎么喜欢我。。。可是还好相处久了，也因为assignment同组，她才有机会了解我，我们才会变成这样要好的朋友。。。当我听到她对我以前的看法时，没有生气，只是在反省，我这样的性格会让人觉得我假惺惺，是不是我的问题呢？是不是不应对人这么好？应该是说，不要那么容易相信人，在还未清楚了解一个人，不要全心全意地去对待他人吗？可是我觉得酱好像也很假叻。。。唉，所以目前为止，我的性格还没变，不知道以后会怎样。。。所以就说，讨厌复杂的人事关系，干嘛人要想那么多，干嘛要带着面具做人？

2. 等到现在（3.24pm）都还未收到offer letter，所以在担心不祥事情又会发生。。。之前不是有提过，若我很想要一样东西时，或以为一定会得到时，一旦告诉别人了，往往事情都会泡汤。。。这次又如何呢？所以在担心。。。

刚才睡了一觉，发梦again。。。这个梦很累咯，因为我在梦里找到的第一份工，竟然是当一位女警，还是要查案捉贼的。。。梦见在案发现场，我和其它警员都在努力的搜查证据和犯人留下的蛛丝马迹。。。我向ah head/Sir报告我找到的东西，是一间房里吊着的窗帘，窗帘上有符号，但还未查清到底符号代表着什么。。。结果，不记得是如何，我们找到了犯人，就还在现场，所以现场就一片混乱，我刚好看到犯人要逃，而且手上还拿着parang刀，我就不知何时，手上又有一把刀，但当然不能和犯人的那把比，可是我还是试着阻挡犯人逃离，他就要用parang刀来攻击我，当然我很害怕，就用手上的到来顶，可是犯人很大力，我已经使出浑身的力，都不够他来。还好，其它伙计帮忙我，但是不知怎样，犯人突然想与我们同归于尽，就用煤气来引爆现场，所有人包括我都在逃。。。就跑到很累，刚才又用了很多力。。。结果真的爆炸了，我们刚跑到出口，我记得我要出去了，但已经开始爆炸了，很危险，不知道有没有及时出到去，只知道要出去时有障碍，很热的铁。。。突然就醒了。。。好action的一个梦，睡醒我松了口气，因为知道并不是真的，可是真的很累咯，好像没睡到酱。。。

发了梦，有种庆幸的感觉，还好我不是女警，好危险哦。。虽然心脏没问题，迟早会被吓死/紧张死。。。哈哈！

18.02.09 - 非常无力的一天

2009-02-18T16:07:00.000+08:00

今天一早八点就要出门，因为十点有interview。。。

心情不好，是昨天带来的。。。原因，当然关于找工的事咯，令我觉得很“虚”，无力，所以就很想念Ned 和 Eve。他们是我在Liverpool时帮过我很多的人，在我最脆弱时，扶我一把，给我信心，所以现在每每遇到挫折都会想到他们是怎样鼓励我的，他们是那么的相信我，比我对我自己更有信心。。。谢谢你们，我敬爱的老师！一想到他们，就有一种不知何时才会跟他们见面的感觉。当我回来之前，最后一次与他们见面时，我真的有说不出的想念和舍不得，不敢说得太白，怕弄到场面很伤感，不想他们又看到我哭的样子。。。

从昨天的没信心，带到今天去interview，一路搭KTM和LRT都在想。。。思绪很乱。。。今早的KTM特别冷，路途也像特别的漫长，站在门边望出去，看着轨道不停的在往反方向移动，更觉得路途遥远。。。像是要去一个很遥远的地方，而且是非常的孤单旅程。。。在等火车的到来，我竟然差点哭了出来，鼻好酸，眼睛湿湿的。。。今天有带着mp3，一路上都在听歌，可音乐的功能今早突然失效，完全没有让我心情好转的迹象，还是继续听。。。到了KL Sentral就要搭LRT，没想到竟然比KTM多人，挤了一下。。。唉~

今天的interview其实也蛮顺利，只是translation部分，我觉得我做到很差，不知是不是被心情影响，或者可能我的translation/language真的就没有那么好，常识又不比人家多。。。Interview完了，就不想去想了。。。会让我更伤心而已。。。本想约Belle一起吃午餐，因为interview的地方，就在她公司楼下，但她没空，就不打扰她。。。

还是那么的无力，很想很想去唱k，可是很懒得等大姐放工才回家，会很累，而且今晚有打羽球，所以就决定在回之前，去mid valley看戏。。。本来要看Bride Wars的，时间不适合，就选了Pink Panther 2看咯。。。很早就进戏院，我是第一个人进那间戏院咯，冷到。。。我也买了我最爱的 Ice Lemon Tea combo (ice lemon tea+popcorn) 当午餐，因为很久没吃popcorn了。。。没想到，popcorn竟然是large的。。。吃到我要呕，也尽量的吃，结果还是吃不完，lemon tea也没喝完。。。Pink Panther 2蛮不错，很好笑。。。一整天没笑过的脸，仿佛僵硬了，就因为这部戏，我终于笑了。。。有点安慰，至少觉得今天看戏是对的，不算浪费钱。。。

回家，还是一样，音乐陪伴我。。。刚好听到杰伦的“稻香”，歌词仿佛在安慰我，所以听了又特别有感触。。。比起平时听这首歌，今天听到特别好听。。。也让我想起家里的一堆猪，因为都是在我很伤心，不开心时收到的，是它们让我笑的。。。到了Kajang，本想走路去town搭巴士或taxi回，但脚痛，穿了一天高跟鞋，又累了，就直接在ktm station搭taxi回，RM7 就酱没了。。。心痛！现在要省钱，还没找到工，又要还Kojadi。。。唉~想到就头痛！

真的要休息了，晚上还要打球。。。

元宵节凌晨。。。

2009-02-12T13:34:00.002+08:00

今年的元宵节，真得很够力特别，也不会忘记我和姐姐，弟弟所做的傻事！

在年初十四晚上，我和姐姐，弟弟，像往常般的再打麻将。由于我们都不饿，所以当天的晚餐都没吃。二姐就说，竟然没吃晚餐，要不要晚上去mamak？过后，不知谁提议，应该是大姐或弟弟，说要吃麦当劳的早餐，在凌晨四点开始出售的。我们就决定，打麻将到四点，去吃McD。

其实之前每次都是大姐说要四点去吃McD的早餐，可是都不成，因为不可能等到凌晨去吃啊。。。我一直都不明白，McD的早餐是从四点开始，可是到早上的十一点啊，为什么非要凌晨四点去吃呢？可以睡醒了才吃啊。。唉！

就这样，这次我们决定，说了就要做到，每次都放飞机，没有吃到。。。结果，我们真行！！！真的打麻将到三点多，四点去吃早餐。其实当天我已经很累了，最近又常常迟睡，但还是因为McD的sausage mcmuffin让我撑到四点！我们打完麻将，不不。。应该是在打麻将时，就已经是语无伦次了，大家都blur blur了，简单的数学也不会算。。我更搞笑，一直说废话，说了又自己笑（他们也有笑啦），就跟我喝醉酒没什么分别。。。二姐更厉害，竟然说了一句经典的suggestion -->“现在三点多，不然我们不要去近近的McD啦，驾车去远一点的，到了McD，就已经四点咯！”哇噻，笑死我！我说她更blur过我！哈哈。。。

虽然大家都很累，始终，我们还是撑到3.50am，到McD刚好四点，order了，我们很快速的，在二十分钟内解决了我们的早餐。。。可能都很累了，所以就吃到很快，吃完了，我们的惨样，累样都出完来了，已回到家，就睡觉了。。。

疯狂的凌晨。。。

CNY dinner - 7th February 09

2009-02-12T11:41:00.000+08:00

今年的新年过得很热闹，我是指我家人。。。因为今年二姐有回来一起过新年。。。加上本小姐也没什么节目，大多数都是在家，跟家人玩扑克牌或打麻将。。。嘻嘻，我们真得很会善于利用新买的麻将哦，时时刻刻都能听见我家传出麻将声。。。我们个个都快成为“雀圣，雀后”了。。（开玩笑，没那么厉害）

上星期五（6/2/09），我和二姐就先到姑姑家住了一个晚上，第二天（7/2/09）我家人和叔叔一家才来一起吃晚餐。这顿晚餐真是吃得开心。。。弟弟又特地从Kampar回来，因为本来会去上课了，贪吃贪玩咯。。不过，他回来也好，他比较玩得，比较癫，可以跟我一起癫。。。哈哈！

当晚叔叔迟到，因为不会去姑姑家，所以我们在等待当儿，就一直在拍照。。大姐竟然不带自己的SLR，拿了我的pink canon来拍。。。不要紧，也拍到不错一下的咯。。（暗喜，嘻嘻！）

*大堂妹 + 二姐 + 我*

*弟弟 + 我*

*堂弟 + 我*

*干嘛不爽，还给我“一指神功”*

*大堂妹＋我*

*我＋小堂妹*

*做么不给我拍？*

*爸爸在和二姐研究他电话的camera and video function*

*爸爸要拍我，给我拍回！哈哈。。*

*干嘛互相残杀？？*

*婆婆很厉害，知道要拍照，立刻闭起眼睛，我都不够她快！*

到了饭店。。还是继续拍。。。

*大人一桌*

*小孩子一桌 (谁偷拍的？）*

*准备捞生*

*假的yum seng!竟然有酱油？*

*我＋弟弟＋爸爸＋二姐*

*这次还有大姐和大哥*

*这次是真的yum seng，喊到没有声*

*“小孩子”一起拍照，少了大堂妹*

*这张就较完整，也和叔叔一起拍*

回家前要拍大合照，因为太多人，老人家／大人们也不方便动来动去，所以我们就分开两次拍，左边拍了，到右边，好像明星哦。。。嘻嘻！

*跟公公婆婆和姑姑一起拍，我们后面的就是所谓要动来动去的明星*

*这里有爸爸，他的朋友，姑丈和姑丈的亲戚*

好多人。。我们yum seng也很吵。。。拍完照留念就回了。。。很开心的一顿晚餐！

失望。。。

2009-02-05T23:04:00.000+08:00

“失望”，好像往往都离不开我生活圈子里。。。当然知道这是人之常情，没有失望，就不会在拥有的时候觉得幸福满足；但，我就是不喜欢那种感觉。。。这种感觉，就似明明你已经中了头奖，要去领钱时，服务员告诉你，你不符合他们的条件，必须要like this and like that。。。就酱，从高高跌下来。。。

从小，每每想得到一样东西，或是想要发生的事情，一旦说出口了（对别人说），或一直一直在想时，到头来我就是得不到/发生不了的。。。也许我迷信，但，真的很邪喔，当然有证实过（not scientific），就我很想要事情是这样的，也预料到应该会是酱，可中间就会有些突发状况，令事情有所改变。。。我知道，有很多事情是预料不到的，但因种种因素看来，真的本来应该发生的，却没发生，反而。。。

找工作也是酱！抱了希望，当然更渴望如我想象般的顺利，怎知，到现在还在量地。。。也是一次次的失望。。。

说到这个，让我联想起我不会做选择的坏习惯。会不会是因为我怕做了选择，到头来，我得到的结果也不会是我要的？！有这个可能。。。但，到目前为止，我这个坏习惯还是存在，何时我才会果断的帮自己做选择呢？

话说回来，“失望”，我觉得没有人希望自己会有酱的感觉吧？！每当我一失望，就会让我想起很多很多事情，当然都是不好的事情咯。。。有时，真的因为失望到麻木了，居然会酱安慰自己，“不要紧啦，不是大问题啦，又不是没试过，下次什么都不说就对了/下次别抱酱大希望咯！”

不要一而再，再而三的失望好吗？我也会失去信心的。。。

花能解语。。。

2009-02-01T21:36:00.000+08:00

花能解语，也许就能缩成所谓的“花语”，也就是，玫瑰，所能带出的意思。。这是我一直很想知道的，终于无意间被我知道了。。有了线索，就在这和大家分享。。。我想，对男生有很大的帮助哦！

送玫瑰：
1 朵 - 一见钟情，你是我的唯一，唯一的爱，对你情有独钟，心中只有你
2 朵 - 你浓我浓，心心相印，世界只有我和你
3 朵 - 我爱你
4 朵 - 誓言，承诺，海誓山盟
5 朵 - 无怨无悔
6 朵 - 顺心如意，顺利，永结同心，愿你一切顺利
7 朵 - 天天想你，相逢知心，求婚，祝福，喜相逢，祝你幸运

8 朵 - 珍贵弥补，歉意，弥补，深深歉意，请原谅我
9 朵 - 天长地久，长相厮守，长相守，坚定，彼此相爱长久
10 朵 - 十全十美，完美的你，完美的爱情
11 朵 - 最爱，最爱的你，双双对对，一心一意，今生最爱还是你
12 朵 - 比翼双飞，求婚，圆满组合，心心相印

13 朵 - 暗恋的人
17 朵 - 好聚好散，让我们的爱到此为止
20 朵 - 两情相悦，一生一世，永远爱你，此情不渝
21 朵 - 我的最爱，最爱
22 朵 - 两情相悦, 双双对对
24 朵 - 无时无刻，思思念念，思念（24小时无时不思念）
30 朵 - 不需言语的爱

33 朵 - 我爱你，非常爱你，深情呼唤我爱你
36 朵 - 我心属于你，浪漫心情，全因有你
44 朵 - 至死不渝，山盟海誓，恒古不变的誓言
50 朵 - 这是无悔的爱

55 朵 - 无怨无悔
57 朵 - 吾爱吾妻
66 朵 - 顺利，事事顺利，情场顺利，六六大顺，细水长流
77 朵 - 喜相逢，求婚，情人相逢，相逢自是有缘
88 朵 - 弥补歉意，用心弥补一切的错
99 朵 - 长相厮守，坚定不移的信念，天长地久，地老天荒，永恒的爱

100 朵 - 白头偕老，百年好合，爱你亿万年，百分百的爱
101 朵 - 直到永远，无尽的爱，唯一的爱，你是我唯一的爱
108 朵 - 求婚，嫁给我吧，无尽的爱
111 朵 - 无尽的爱

123 朵 - 爱情自由，自由恋爱
144 朵 - 12 x 12 爱你日日月月，爱你生生世世
365 朵 - 天天想你，天天爱你
999 朵 - 天长地久，爱无止休，长相厮守，至死不渝，无尽的爱
1001 朵 - 一辈子的最爱，一心一意，忠贞的爱，至死不渝

看完后，就觉得原来花也有这么多意思。。。要注意，别乱乱送哦，尤其是17朵。。

除夕。。。25/1/09

2009-01-25T20:39:00.000+08:00

今年的除夕比较特别，因为二姐就在今天从美国回来，来得及一起吃团圆饭。。。当然所有人都很高兴，包括我！

一早就去机场接机，回到家不久，又陪她去理发，买东西。。。回到家已经中午了，真得很累，因为昨晚也蛮迟睡的。。。躺在床上就不省人事了。。。

下午也是忙着帮忙整理家里，拜神等。。。还有，我们终于买了一幅麻将。。。嘻嘻！而且，很意外的收到他的简讯，要我不要吃那么多柑，怕我肚子痛。。也提醒我要小心饮食。。。

晚上的团圆饭有肉有虾，这次我吃了三只虾，破了我的纪录。。。以往我吃虾，尤其是要剥壳的，都不吃，要不然就只吃一只，因为懒得剥。。。每次若他在，都是他剥给我吃，所以又想到他。。。应该是时候坚强了吧。。。加油！明天就是新的一年，我真得很希望，明年会过得更好！也望我身边的人一样，牛年会更好！

巴刹风云。。。

2009-01-25T20:16:00.000+08:00

除夕的前一天，星期六的一大早，婆婆就叫我和姐姐起床去巴刹。。。第一次这么早去，可是人潮却比平常的热闹。。

以上的图片，只是显示了其中一档卖鸡的档口。别看它这么多人，其实老板还没来的咯，只有几位员工到了，准备开档。。。

婆婆要去另外一档买东西，就叫我帮她“排队”，而且我本来是站在最前线，也就是第一排，怎知，员工们把鸡一只只拿出来时，aunty们的手就好像在挖金酱，顿时间我不知该如何是好。。我不会选鸡，也不打算碰鸡，就觉得我被夹在aunty们中间好像很不好意思。。。也不知道什么时候，就被挤到后面去了。。。真是。。。无言。。。所以就拿出手机来拍。。

真得很佩服aunty们的“挤功”。。。

晴天霹雳。。。

2009-01-22T18:54:00.000+08:00

这两天真的让我“晴天霹雳”。。。

终于明白。。说分手的那一方，其实也没有比听到分手的那方好过。。。

两个人的感情，是要靠双方来维持，一旦不平衡了，就很容易变质，甚至大家变回普通朋友。。。

你说我没有想过你的感受，其实我有，也想得比别人多。。因为怕错过，怕伤害。。爱一个人，就要努力的捉紧他，不放手。。。也许，我的改变，让我知道，我还不会把握。。说我不喜欢你，是假的，毕竟在一起这么久了。。我也接受不到我的改变。。我只能说，对不起！

所谓顺其自然，就看我们的缘分吧。。也许突然有一天，终于想通了，我不能没有你，我就真的努力的捉着不放了。。可能到时候你已经变了，我能接受，正如你所说，“今天的这一切，你要付最大的责任！”

我知道你挺得很累，虽然说还爱我，我也不想一直让你累下去，虽然不舍得，不能这样自私，就让它随缘吧。。。

KPMC...ish~!!!

2009-01-22T17:47:00.000+08:00

*KPMC - Kajang Plaza Medical Centre*

Such a "nice" medical centre...nice until i wanna post it in my blog...

Few days back, my grandpa fell down outside garden, bleeding and a bit injured on his face.. Luckily I at home that day..if not only left my grandma with him, sure my grandma very scared...I scared actually, when I saw so many blood on the grass..I was very shocked, and worried...panic as well..Luckily, grandpa was ok, oni injured on his face and bleeding from nose..not other parts..I quickly called my brother and asked him came back to fetch grandpa to either clinic or hospital... Then I helped to clean my grandpa blood...so many blood..scary~

My brother came back d, we send grandpa to clinic and tried to find clinic that have x-ray..but..dun have..so end up, v found tis KPMC..wah..got x-ray woh..then ok lor..juz went in lor..inside got many patients oso..tot is quite ok de medical centre lor..got x-ray some more...ish~~~mana tau..

1st, they send our grandpa to emergency room lor..to clean the blood, n check whether got anything serious onot..it's 3pm..they also checked for the blood pressure..my grandpa always got high blood pressure de..but tat day, his blood pressure suddenly increase very high..and doctor adviced to stay wad or go hospital stay 1 night for check up..coz scared of too high blood pressure...so, v decided to let my grandpa stay in KPMC's wad..dun wan move here move there..my dad agreed as well..Then, my brother went to pay deposit...RM500..we curious why so expensive...the wad that they told us was oni RM60 per nite..at the end..my brother still paid d...They move my grandpa to wad lor..

About KPMC...

1. Room service very "GOOD":

When reach the room, the nurse asked me, is it 2 beds? I wonder, why 2 beds? I got 1 grandpa who stay in the wad oni woh...I said, 1 oni, my grandpa...Then she asked me..is there anyone stayed here today? Then oni i realised she was saying the one who staying to accompany my grandpa..I said, "Ya, I will stay tonite.." Then she ask a FUNNY and IMPORTANT question, "Do you want a bed?" Shit~!!! Apa tu??? Why I need a bed??? Ish~!!! Then I said I dun need lor...I wanted to ask, "if i said i wan,then u wana charge me another bed de money izit?" ish~!

2. Cleaner vacancy available:

My grandpa need to pee..not so convenient to walk to the toilet...so..juz use the chamber pot and pee..and causes the floor got a bit dirty...me and my brother went to ask for cleaner lor..to clean up/mop the floor lor..he called 1 time...I called another time..same result..no one come..I wonder they dun have cleaner de meh? satu pun tak de? takkan all rehat sama-sama de gua...The nurse told us..the cleaner time not yet reach lar..ask us wait..OK..FINE..WE WAIT!

3. Doctor vacancy also available:

My grandpa in the emergency room around 3pm and they send him to wad around 3.30pm..then we asked when is the doctor/specialist will come..the nurse said..soon..the doctor will came back later...ok..WE WAIT..4.30pm..not yet come woh..my grandpa's nose bleeding again..non-stop..Sure we worry..and ask the nurse..when the doctor come..they said, "Coming, kami sudah called..." Fine..WE WAIT...how?grandpa nose still bleeding..we asked the nurse..she gave me some ice..asked me put on grandpa's forehead...put d..STILL THE SAME LER...mau macam mana..doctor dun hv..still bleeding..they can't stop the bleeding..cannot macam tu ler..5pm sth..I asked the nurse about the arrival of their SPECIALIST DOCTOR...she told me..will be reached at 6pm..SHIT!!! we WAIT for 3 hours for the doctor ler..and the bleeding they can't make it stop..SHIT!!!!!!

Moreover, I don't dare to judge the doctors' professionalism...just we felt tat the doctors came also, check a bit oni..cakap a bit..and macam din cakap and din do anything...ish!!! And one of the doctor looks like very young..duno reliable onot...lagi..his medical fees more expensive than another doctor who looks more old/reliable...what he had done? we also duno, why he can charge so many??!!

What I has to conclude is...i very very super "beh song", "bu shuang", disatisfied with KPMC services..ish~!!!

*being blacklisted by me*

烦！！！

2009-01-04T20:29:00.000+08:00

最近发生了很多事情。。也都出乎我的预料。。更不知道是好或坏事。。。

很想很想去旅行，或去某个地方可以让我逃避的避难所，更可以让我放松的地方。。我觉得很烦很烦。。以前这种情况，只会在面临考试，或太多assignments才会有的。。还以为毕业了，就不会再有这种感觉，因为真的不好受。。。

还没找到工的我，应该更容易乱想吧。。。朋友都担心我会转牛角尖。。。对不起，各位！我已经努力把一切想得简单，也很希望一切都不复杂。。。可是。。

还好这几天，有朋友们的陪伴，大家出来聚聚。。要不然我在家，真的是beh tahan。。。很久都没看鬼戏了，昨天Zi Piu陪我看。。其实整出戏都不是很够力的恐怖，不过有一part，是我们大家都没想到，那个“人”就是鬼。。我一时放轻松了，没注意到，就被突然变了鬼脸的“他”给吓到我喊。。可笑的是，我一喊，隔壁不认识的男生被我吓到了，整个人跳了起来，然后望着我。。当然，这时的我，肯定很paise。。。就望去另外一边。。。对不起啦。。看鬼戏就要预备会有人喊嘛。。我也不想的。。所以我一直都用手盖着嘴巴。。只是那一part真的是一时疏忽。。。哈哈！！！

还是一样。。很想离这里远远的。。暂时让我不想。。可以吗？？？很想去唱k!!!desperately wanna sing k...anyone wanna join???

雪。欢。季

2008-12-24T12:53:00.000+08:00

这几天很忙，很累。。因为参加了中学St. John的division camp。已经几年没回去了，这次特别多回忆。。不断的浮现在脑海里。。看见junior们，就像看见以前的自己，也参加了这样的露营，也和一大班AJK办过酱的camp。这次他们的camp都算是蛮成功的，当然这少不了他们的seniors，也就是ex-AJK的帮忙 --〉Ah Teh 和 Wai Ming。他们一直在这班小伙子筹备的当时，就不断的给于协助，我呢，就只在camp的当天，这四天三夜里，帮忙拍照，参与游戏，和一些打扫工作。。。但这几天真的带给我很多的快乐，仿佛我又年轻了，回到中学时。。

其实拍了很多照片，有很搞笑的，也有纪念性的，开心的，辛苦的。。本来可以post在这里跟大家分享，但是照片需要被某人filter后，我才拿到。。所以，唯有耐心等待。。因为那位某人真的是大忙人，有很多必须做的事还没完成。。一切都记录在他的手机里。。。

camp最好玩的游戏，莫过于Blizard War Game。。亏Ah Teh想到这个游戏，真的非常刺激，好玩，可是真得很累，因为就真的像打仗那样，我们ex-AJK与AJK联手，要打败members。。他们也有联盟，五组一起攻打我们。而我们就要一边防守我们的base，看好人质，同时也要出去找机会捉更多的人质。。。而且我们玩面粉和水，真的是有够肮脏。。。清洗工作也很艰难。。。某人说，“50kg的面粉就可以把学校毁掉！”哈哈。。。

不知是不是很久没玩这种游戏，特别容易累，也特别easy受伤。。。除了打仗，之前我还玩physical test，很够力的累。。而且同一天还拔河，真的像整个人都散了。。腰酸背痛。。。不过，这次的拔河比赛，是我最卖力拔的一次哦，还是很开心，虽然弄伤一点。。。

总之，这个camp真的不错。。。它叫“雪。欢。季”。。。这次camp fire时的dance，也蛮好跳的，可能因为我喜欢Jay的音乐吧。。我就是很想跳。。

Summary: - This camp gave me lots of fun and memory...Thanks!!!

爆了？！！

2008-12-04T00:02:00.000+08:00

刚打完羽球回来，好累！今晚打球是用来发泄的，我很用力去打每一球，把所有的不满，不开心，烦恼，一一打了出去，心情总算好一点了。。。

而且，今天还发生了一件趣事！其中一位与我partner的朋友，他的裤子破了。。不是笑他的裤子破了，而是那个情形。。原本球还在打着的，我也应该接到那往我方向飞来的羽球，可是突然我听到他喊，“爆了！”我就傻傻的站在那不接球，顿时停住了。。。对手Teck Cheong还问我，“你干嘛不打？”我说，“他喊爆了！”我们都不知道什么事，结果他说，“是我的裤子爆了。。”吓到我，还以为什么爆了，原来是这样，我们就一起大笑。。哈哈！！！

还好今天听耀辉的话，去打球发泄，要不然，我真的就快爆了！！这几天不知为什么压力很大，也想很多东西。。。而且刚刚又收到email，又一份工作interview失败了！！希望不安和烦恼，赶快离我远远的。。。我不想你靠近我！！！

Disappointed with tiredness...

2008-12-02T21:44:00.000+08:00

This few days very hardworking looking for jobs, went to interviews...but all still have to wait...don't know whether how was the result...but seems like...aih...!!!

TIRED and WASTE my transportation fees going to KL...I know have to face this before I get job, and I have to be patient..but..AT LEAST, give me some feedback or tips, when will I found my job? or whether I have the chance to success in the interview?!!! I don't know about how was my interviews going so far, may be very sucks...very bad...that's why until now oso haven't found one...

I don't dare to think so much after interview, I also don't wana put much expectation on every interview, because the bigger expectation, the bigger disappointed I might get...Losing confidence again...Like last time, I thought the interview was going fine, everything seems like ok, but until now, I haven't get the call from that company...I don't know why...I was thinking is it because of my expected salary too high? and now the economy like this..??

However, I cannot get the job that is too low salary, I will not afford to pay back my loan and cover my other expenses...when I think of money, I am so frustrated about it..everythings money...and I actually wanna make my hair become curly de...but..have to wait lor...

Where is my lucky star???

复杂的我。。。？！

2008-11-26T11:11:00.000+08:00

了解。。？到底怎样才算是了解一个人呢？相信有看Madagascar 2 里的Gloria 和Melman，都觉得Melman很了解Gloria，可是真正的世界，有多少人能做到呢？

何谓了解？知道某人的一切？性格？习惯？能从中配合？还是每一样都必须做到？

每个人的个性不同，要彻底的了解，可能是非常困难的事，也需要非常长的一段时间。。。而且这也不是每个人都能做到的。。就像我和爸爸生活了22年，也不代表我完完全全的了解他。。。是我不够用心吗？还是两个不同个体是不可能彻底的了解呢？

有时候，选择沉默不是我想的。。了解我的朋友，都知道我可以非常的多话，我也可以非常的安静。。安静其实可能累了，也许心情不好，或者知道不说话好过多说，就选择--静静的。。。当我解释了好多遍，我在想什么，对方不了解，还一一强调他自己的想法，那好！你说吧。。我不说了。。这就是我。。。反正我再怎么说，你也是说我不接受你的说法，那你自己不也是酱吗？！

也许，我真的不够聪明，我不懂得如何了解别人，就连很要好的朋友，有时也搞不懂，就当我迟钝吧。。。

我迟钝！！！

火柴。。。

2008-11-25T11:30:00.000+08:00

火柴，是人类生活上常见的，也常用的。。以前，人们用火柴来点火,抽烟等等。。跟着人类把这些小小的火柴作为艺术品，装饰，变成漂亮的火柴。。。

还可以送人哦！！！但是，从小就不会用火柴的我，到现在还是一样。。。我害怕它。。虽然它不会吃掉我，但每每我要点燃一枝火柴，都下不了手，还是会找人帮忙。。。真失败! 有谁知道要怎么克服吗？？我每次要下手时，都怕那火会烧到我的手，因为一点燃，它就会很大火，然后逐渐变小，可是一下子，它就像快要烧完了，又要烧到手了。。。唉。。。

climbing Tapor mountain...~.~''

2008-11-22T19:00:00.000+08:00

THANKS for Yew Fui...coz he successed to persuade me to go with them...it was more harder than what I imagined. I already told him that I got a bit scared high, then he said its ok...not very high also..then fine lor, I followed! And also because of his one sentence, "You won't regret when you climb up there!"

Yesterday nite was so nervous and worry, coz I know is quite dangerous to climb mountain and I never experience before. Until 2.30am only I can sleep, by then my alarm rang around 3.45am, so I only sleep a while before went to climbing. Yew Fui came pick me at 4.30am sharp, then we went to pick Voon Siong, long time din see this black guy...haha!!! He still the same, black...

We then ate breakfast together, I just ate a bit and the rest I gave Voon Siong, I was so nervous and scared until cannot eat...I scared will muntah later when I climb...Then we wait for another guy, Ah Lau, we went to Qi Xiang's house and berkumpul, bertolak sama-sama. It was started raining, we decided to go Tapor 1st then see still raining or not only decide whether continue our climbing or cancel...Luckily, the rain stopped. We started to climb from 6.40am like that. It was still dark, and we need torch light...I mean me..I need torch light...Voon Siong really is the King of Monkey...we called him, coz he walked very fast and can jumped here jumped there..really is our "Si Fu"...

*All my "Si Fu" (from left) - Voon Siong, Yew Fui, Ah Lau and Qi Xiang*

It was hard in the 1st stage, after that, we climb slowly, because I'm 1st time and new on this climbing, they have to wait me and take care of me...Luckily they wait for me..really THANKS!!! Don't know what time, the sky started to bright and the weather was so comfortable...And we reach one of the top of the mountain...We took pictures there...It was nice but it started to rain again...then we planned to climb down from the mountain..But the rain was like no more when we return...then they asked me whether to continue climb or go back..I said I still ok, can continue...then we climb back to the top..And luckily we climbed back, coz we saw rainbow...so nice...

*Me and the gang*

*the rainbow*

*view from top*

*view of another mountain*

Then, we continue climbed to the point that allowed us to go down, and we go down by rope. Besides, it also need to climb over few mountains' tops before we reach the place that we can go down. I was exhausted, and Yew Fui keep on said, almost reached d..almost...then climbed over another hills come again..I think there is 5 hills or more than that we have climbed...I'm so tired..and when I sit down and rest, aih..I cried..coz I takut tinggi...and I'm tired...Actually the whole trip might only need 3 hours like that to complete (for normal speed), and because of me, we used around 5 hours to complete the whole journey...I was slow because I was scared and don't know how to climb...

*duno how to climb..Voon Siong and Yew Fui teached me..and Ah Lau up there juga "kan sui"..hehe*

*Voon Siong was teaching me how to climb up...*

*Wah..macam very enjoy de??!!*

*I was sitting there rest...but still hv to do some pose*

Luckily Yew Fui waits me, and we go down slowly, coz it was quite slippery and with mud...I walked very slow...and the sun was so hot, and in the jungle, I was almost fainted..coz too hot d...a bit blur blur...But I continue walked..coz Yew Fui encouraged me..."U can do it, come on!!!" and again, he told me "Almost reached d"...And finally, I can safely reached the ground...THANK GOD!!!..Was exhausted..really..reached ground around 11.45am...Voon Siong, Ah Lau and Qi Xiang were waiting us in the car d...

It's such a exhausted and nice experience...And got some bruises on my legs, even I wore long pants...my hand as well...a bit hurt by the rocks...but..still consider safe la..oso have to say "Amitabha...!!!"

Madagascar 2...

2008-11-16T01:32:00.000+08:00

Tonite, me, my brothers and sister went to KLCC to watch Madagascar 2. It was so funny and nice...Enjoy it very much...

Before we enter the cinema, my brother and sister went to buy the popcorn. Theere were lots of people line up and a short Malay woman was in front of us. Then, when the salesgirl shout "Next", and she looking at my brother..my brother thought was calling us, and is our turn..he totally ignored the Malay woman..and said "I want..." and me and my sister quickly stopped him, coz we know its the woman's turn...Then the salesgirl was laughing, we were laughing as well..damn funny and embarrassed...wahaha!!!

My brother's reason was, he said he can't saw the "short" woman...really cannot see...hehehe...

the show not yet start then we laugh like hell...stupid...!!!

the 1st interview...@.@

2008-11-12T22:03:00.000+08:00

Today...1st interview as translator...in cheras..I don't know the exactly place, that's why my brother went with me...we took bus to cheras then only find where is the place...

When I found that place, its earlier than the interview appoinment that I made. I just went into the company and asked whether I can do it earlier...Luckily they allowed and also luckily I went earlier...coz they want me to do a test...translate from the dialogues, stories, lyrics and so on that they gave me. I was so blur..I mean especially the 一枝梅 story...I never watched that movie before, and I don't know about it..and I simply translate those characters in the story, coz I tot they aren't exist...but..I'm wrong..aiks..

My brother wait me at there from 11.30am, then around 12pm sth, I asked him to go Leisure Mall and wait me, whether he wanna watched movie or whatever, coz I know I will use lots of time...I translate until 3pm sth, he finished watched movie I also haven't finished, then I asked him to go back 1st or continue wait me...Then he went back 1st...

Around 4pm sth, finally finished..!!! The person interview me for a while, told me about their company..then I oni can go back...

Was so hungry...the whole day...from morning, I only eat one kuih until 4pm sth..hungry like hell...then I walked to Leisure Mall and wait for Jimmy...then oni go Sushi King and eat...5 months din eat sushi d...yummy!!!

Tired day..faced the computer whole afternoon..the computer that I used in the company, was not so good..the screen a bit blur...make me headache oni..keep looking at the screen..@.@

*Now waiting my DURIAN...my dad said his friend has durian...he will bring some for me..coz before that they ate many d...I haven't eat durian since I back...durian~durian~...

my dinner and cake...

2008-11-12T21:22:00.000+08:00

after back to Malaysia, lazy blogging oh..haha..now oni update my blog..wanna do so few days ago de..just LAZY!!!

I cooked for bibi and her bf before I went back to Malaysia...just to thanks them for taken care of me in Liverpool...So, I made tiramisu cake, cook gu rou chicken, ABC soup, egg and vege...and white rice as well..haha

*Tiramisu cake's ingridients*

*I made into bowls and tupperwears, easier to eat, coz I invited my friends to eat my cake*

*Adding cocoa powder and strawberry on top before serving*

For the dinner, I just cooked for bibi and her bf, coz its hard and lagi challenging to cook for more people. This was the first time I cooked alone, and prepare all the things myself. Can't believe I can make it..haha!

*gu rou chicken*

*tomato sauce - for gu rou chicken*

*ABC soup - my favourite soup, yummy!*

*egg - I always failed to turn it back, sure make it a hole here or there..still need practice*

*white rice - without burnt*

About the rice, luckily din burnt this time. Coz this is not rice cooker, so its easy burnt and not easy to cook the rice with this. The 1st time I cooked the rice with this, it totally burnt...Only half of the rice can eat..coz really black at the bottom and the side...aiks..but this time success d..wahaha!!!

All in all, not easy to cook a dinner / meal...so..better not to cook..thats why I at Liverpool always eat bread or biscuits..easy, fast, no problem! haha...

Halloween in Liverpool...

2008-11-02T19:52:00.000+08:00

*duno what this guy pretending..but he was nice*

Halloween...was impressive and cold...people still able to wear their costume which seksi, less clothes..we wear coat and scarf also freezing...I saw some of them shaking...coz too cold..

*group of witches*

There are many kind of costumes..and they are creative..some really scary..with the make up and blood...I saw witches, super-man and woman, batman, flinstones, ghostbuster, Zoro..and so on...

*group of super-heroes*

*teletubbies and that one duno what..*

*nurse and doctor*

*the police's dog was checking those who going into the pub*

There were at least 4 policemen outside each pub or clubbing area...and also they prepared a dog to smell those people to check whether they have drugs...

but, there are still many people hanging around there..some are really crazy...and some are drunks...

*hard to differentiate those costumes...*

*flinstone and duno wat, looks like santa*

have a great nite out there..even we are not joining those pubs...but we saw many creative people dress up nicely, scary, bloody and most impressive thing is they can tahan COLD...

~HAPPY HALLOWEEN~

early SNOW...>.<

2008-10-30T00:16:00.000+08:00

*snow on the road*

This early morning, I was still dreaming...Suddenly bibi wake me up, she told me its snowing outside. It was only 6am sth...and surely, it is damn cold...She asked me wanna go out and took photo or not..definitely I want la...wait so long d...

*not selling the car, hehe!*

It is so cold outside there, and I din see snow falling, but only the snow on the car...and it seems like the snow falled quite some times already, it started to melt..and looks like tiny snow ball, a bit like ice...freezing out there...

*I wanna took the photo of the car, but its too cold d, the camera also cannot tahan d..can't really take a good pic!*

sweet toffee apple...

2008-10-29T05:48:00.000+08:00

*took on my birthday, the mini cake with a toffee apple*
(don't look at my hair, its messy and I wanna "fix" it when I go back Malaysia)

That day, my birthday, not only have a mini cake, bibi also buy me a toffee apple --> apple with a layer of sugar like that..which specially famous during Halloween. I never tried before...I haven't eat that apple until tonite...coz that nite I was very full with the dinner that they cook for me and also a tiramisu cake that bibi make for me...

So, tonite also take dinner alone..i ate mashed potato, which bibi do for me in the morning and also the toffee apple, coz i saw the apple like not so good if keep too long. I never thought this apple will make me so full, I just think it will be sweet but not even sweet, it makes me full as well. The red color layer is the sweet, it was taste like cotton candy, but its hard cotton candy...and it makes my teeth all full with sweet candy...after eat that apple, the 1st thing I do was brush teeth..coz its very sweet...haha..but it is advisable to eat without eating other food...if not, will be full as me now...

ice rain...

2008-10-28T03:20:00.000+08:00

*ice rain in Liverpool on 27th Oct 08*

my new camera function..i not so familiar and don't really know how to fully utilize it..i thought a camera only can took photo either with auto or manual setting..mana tau..aku punye sister beritau..got other function lagi..then oni i know..wah..so many setting..even got "snow" setting...means its purposely create to capture snowing...

finally i know how to set the setting..then i try lor..but also have to wait until it snow or ice rain oni can test mah...so i wait lor..whole day..really keep on raining..its ice..i faster ran down with my camera..then I test with my hand whether its still ice or normal raining..then..i know is ice..y ler..coz my hand sakit..kena itu ice..then i faster took lor..its only 5pm sth, oledi sunset, its dark outside...i thought sure cannot see anything..who knows..haha..i get it..kekeke...so happy...

waiting for more..coz BBC weather said will be very cold next few days..under 0 celcius ler..hee..sure cold die me..but..may be i will go out and try the "cold" that will never happen in Malaysia...

small snow ball...冰泡。。。

2008-10-27T17:35:00.000+08:00

i wanted to see snowing before i get back to Malaysia, cause I didn't see before..

Yesterday midnite, when I sleeping, I heard loud sound from outside..I thought was snow ball..cause my friend told me before, it is quite loud when it is snow ball but it is very little tiny ball and may be oni few seconds or minutes...I can't really see it..coz its just raining..n if its really is..should be easier to see on the road or floor but not like looking outside the window..quite hard to see like tat..then I went back to sleep...

this morning, my friend was having breakfast down there, its raining...and the sound is not as loud as yesterday nite, I dun think it will be snow ball, so I din check from the window...My friend asked me go down coz its snow ball, I can't see from the window, so I ran down and see..its really a tiny snow ball, but its on the floor, and I can't really see it like "snowing"..coz its just a while...then raining d..

and according to BBC weather, this coming wednesday got sleet shower = snow + rain, but duno accurate or not..coz normally it will update again b4 tat day.. wednesday and thursday the lowest temperature is -4 celcius..and friday is 0 celcius..duno its really so low and cold..hmm..i'm waiting...hope to snow again...but i sure cold die..hehe

在歇。。。的白纸

2008-10-25T19:44:00.000+08:00

在英国，说久不久，但和我一起来的朋友，全部都回去了，大多都在工作了，或已经找到工作了；没找到的，也在努力的寻找，去面试。。我呢？还在这里干嘛？朋友说，“一生人要工作的时间还有很长，你怕没得做吗？你还有机会做到你退休六十岁，不如玩够了才回去，因为不知还会不会有机会再回来。。。”不是在咒我，事实上，我也知道，以后要来这里，可能非常难，除非，我中马票，或嫁个有钱人。。。做戏么？！这里的消费，其实真的不高，如果我们是在这里生活工作。。。如果用马币来。。唉！

我当然赞同以上说法，所以我才留到现在。。。可是，我记得有位朋友的阿姨告诉我们，“如果你会想，你就会想到你用着的，是你父母的钱，他们都没机会来享受，为什么你会觉得你现在享受，是正确的呢？如果真的要来，以后自己赚钱来，那不是更好吗？！”顿时，我想了想，她说的其实也有道理。。。茅盾的我，就这样，歇到现在。。我不知道对不对，但至少我爸没有我想像的，催我回去。。

可是，每当我一想到，明年开始就要还钱，我就会害怕。。。不是要赖账，而是还没找到工的我，竟然还没回去。。而且这一切的“歇”，就快要停止了，就从我回去的那刻开始，要为以后的日子打拼，就觉得有点不敢相信，也不想去相信。。这么快就长大了，这么快就要踏入社会。。。朋友常说我还是一张白纸，以后的日子，没有我想的那么单纯，“世间险恶”。。之所以酱，我才不愿长大，宁愿永远留在校园里。。我常都在想，我最开心，怀念时刻是中学。。很希望能回去。。我学习，看到最多的是在college。。。以后呢？不敢去想。。我不想白纸变质，我希望是自己去涂上色彩，而不是被周围影响而沾上的颜色。。。

社会真的是变了。。为什么？我很想了解。。为什么人会有私心，而因为酱，往往更多的纠纷会产生。。。有没有一个世界，只是平等，只是公正，只是安全，只是。。。我想，这些只是不可能会有的吧？！

UK birthday..presents..

2008-10-25T19:15:00.000+08:00

*mini fruit cake. canon pink camera, mopod*

finally...my presents reached...the other two is a surprise...I only know my sis will buy me a pink camera, and I'm waiting the delivery, coz already exceed the date that I supposed received it..

The mopod come first. It is a mobile accessory, in the middle has a pink kitty, the kitty will turn and also there will be lighting when the phone ring or receive sms. This present was my aunt and cousins, they asked my sis to buy for me as my birthday gift. This is the 1st surprise. Then I receive another mini fruit cake. I wonder it can eat..but it really is a real cake, together with my sis's photo on the surface. This is also a surprise where I don't know she will send this kind of cake to me...and before that, I still always blame and joking with her that I can't go US find her, cannot eat her cake and muffin..haha..now, i get a cake..mini cake..hehe

At last, yesterday, I received the pink camera d...was so happy..the camera was nice and the picture that it tooks was nice as well...but it will be more better if the camera is pink enough like the Sony one..that pink was sharp...haha..but still ok la..I will try to find a pink camera case...hope i can find...normally sold in black color de..sien..!!!

Anyway..THANK YOU again...for the presents and surprise..the mini cake, I won't eat 1st, I will bring back Mas and let them see 1st...hehe!

敲门声。。。怕 + 等待。。。

2008-10-24T00:43:00.000+08:00

最近，不知为什么特别多人敲门。。。

之前，没那么注意到，自从某天，一个人在家时，在看着鬼戏，光天化日，应该没什么问题的。。。怎知道，还是有点怕怕，突然间，有人敲门。。这地区的屋子不习惯有门铃，所以大多都是直接敲在木门板上，或是门中间的信箱口，就会听到很大声的“砰砰”。。。不用说，我当然被吓到咯。。因为从没有人这样大力的敲门，而且是敲到很急的，我就赶快跑下楼。跑到一半，我停了下来，因为真的很恐怖，我从门中间的玻璃看过去，是一位黑肤色的女人，她还在敲，又用耳朵听屋里的声音（外面看不到屋里）。。她还告诉身边的人，“I heard someone just now!” 我不敢开门，因为不认识，敲门又敲到像要打架酱，最后她走了。

晚上，又有人敲门。。。这次我朋友回来了，他问清楚了才开门，原来是隔壁的邻居，她说我们有包裹，帮我们签收了。。。就是我姐姐寄来的神秘小蛋糕。。。哈哈！

这几天也是一直听到敲门声，都在注意着，因为我姐要送我毕业+生日礼物 = 相机。。还没到叻，不知道失踪去哪里了，唉！！！我们都在怪Amazon.uk。。。希望在我回去前就寄到来啦。。。我的粉红相机呢？？！！

Edinburgh trip...

2008-10-19T05:26:00.000+08:00

The very first time, I travel alone...I been sing k, watch movie, shopping alone, but I never imagined that I will and I already travel alone to Edinburgh on 14th Oct (10.15pm coach from Liverpool), reached there around 7.15am morning on 15th Oct. It was so cold that morning, windy and I can saw the "gas" from my mouth when I breath...I was wearing 3 layers of long sleeves, with my scarf...Still, I was very very super duper cold..It was only 8 celcius...I cannot stand the coldness anymore, after I found the right way from the coach station to the city, and I saw the information centre but it opened at 9pm. So, I went into the McD which was only opposite road of the info centre...I ordered a bacon bread (if i'm not mistaken with the name) and cup of cappucino as my breakfast...It was wonderful, because I was freezing and my hand was so cold, it was perfect to drink a hot cappucino to warm my stomuch...

*my warm breakfast..nice oh..and the bacon bread, I never tried at Malaysia before*

*my lovely cappucino*

Then I started went around while waiting the info centre to open. Edinburgh is quite nice and was busy as well..the buildings here is quite nice..There are "old" town and "new" town...After the info centre opened, I baught the Highland one day tour ticket, which was at the next day 16th Oct, from 8am to 8.30pm. It is seems like a long journey, coz using the whole day, but my friends recommend me to take part, so...Then, I asked for the ghost tour ticket as well..."Ghost Tour", is very famous in Edinburgh (based on one of my lecturer, Ned)...and it is like the people will guide and bring you around the town, telling you might be ghost, history, scary story of the town...I liked this tour when I heard it, coz I think it is quite interesting, not like normally we went into ghost house and scared by those "ghost"...But, because I was going to take part alone, so, I was scared as well...I asked the girl to choose for me, from the several tours, I want a not really too scary one...and I baught a ticket for the ghost tour...It was at night 7pm. So, I have plenty of time, I went to the Edinburgh castle first...

*I asked the worker of the castle to take picture for me - entrance of castle*

*views of the city - took inside the castle*

Due to Edinburgh castle is located on the hill of the city, so visitors can see many beautiful scenery from here...definitely, it is cold like hell...coz windy that day, and a bit raining in the noon. There are 25 different locations in the castle to visit such as prisons of war, one o'clock gun, Royal palace and so on...

*one of the location signboard*

The most famous thing in the palace is one o'clock gun. This is a cannon which will fire everyday at one o'clock - 1pm. From the history that I read in the exhibition of this cannon, it's previously people used to know what is the time..

*This is the one o'clock gun...and you can see there is a clock beside the cannon*

After finished waiting until 1pm for the fire, I went out and heading towards the city centre...I went to a shop which can saw how the people make tartan mill..its something like this..

*I duno what its called, but its famous in Soctland, and expensive too...*

*Scottish dress code (sth like this)*

After finished visit the shop, I walked around and baught some Scotland short bread, which is famous here as well...Then my lunch settle at Subway (my favourite)...and I ate Italian BMT meal, I never tried 12 inch footlong de, wish I eat once...then I asked the cashier, he said, 12 inch is same price as 6 inch for this meal...aiseh...kalau tahu, I order the long one lor...cheh!!! After finished, I went back to hostel which nearby the city and take a rest and bath before going to the ghost tour. The ghost tour was quite interesting actually, coz the tour guide, bring us walked around the city and told us about the history of those places and then we went to the underground...which he said last time there is a person named Wally, and his friends tried to korek an underground from castle to the palace...something like this...and then it was not successful and he disappeared in the underground...and the story was long...I can't tell all here, and he also can't tell the whole story, so better check history book lor...It was not so scary actually, but just a bit dark, and it was cold..coz at nite, windy as well, and that day was specially cold...not same as Liverpool...

16th Oct...Highland tour

This tour was very nice and bring us to the highland and it is very beautiful...but my camera battery not enough, coz duno when and where I lost one battery...aih...so I continue took picture with my mobile...

*This is famous Scotland Highland bull...means their kind of cow*

Then we went to Urquhart Castle, which located on the highland...It was nice, even it had damaged...

*This is only half of the Urquhart Castle*

*Behind me is another half (I was wearing 5 layers of shirts that day..coz scared cold)*

*inside the castle*

After finished, we ride on a cruise which we were sailed on the Loch Ness...It is famous in Scotland..it is a lake, which last time, some people accidentally took photo of "monster" on this lake and now, they said if anyone able to take similar photos or monster appear on the lake, there will be a reward...

*This is Loch Ness*

*I'm on the cruise*

*This is the "monster"*

The whole trip was something like that, coz the highland trip mostly was taking the beautiful scenery photos...There are still some little story...but not able to finish in one post..so...i post another one when i free la..haha..

说好的幸福呢...

2008-10-12T03:07:00.000+08:00

Another Jay's new song from his new album: 说好的幸福呢

I lagi prefer this song...this song is very sad...meaningful as well!!! he is brilliant!!!very got feeling when I listen to this song...sorry to say that, really make me remember the past...

你的绘画凌乱着. 在这个时刻.
我想起喷泉旁的白鸽. 甜蜜散乱了.
情绪莫名的拉扯. 我还爱你呐.
伴你断断续续唱着歌. 假装没事了.
时间过了走了. 爱情面临选择.
你冷了倦了我哭了.
一开始的不快乐. 你用卡片拭写着.
有些爱只给到这真的懂了.
怎麽了.你累了.说好的.幸福呐
我懂了.不说了.爱淡了.梦远了
开心与不开心.一一叙说着.你在不舍
那些爱过的感觉都太深刻.
我都还记得你不等了.说好的.幸福呐
我错了.泪干了.放手了后悔了
只是回忆的音乐盒还旋转着.要怎么停呐

你的绘画凌乱着. 在这个时刻.
我想起喷泉旁的白鸽. 甜蜜散乱了.
情绪莫名的拉扯. 我还爱你呐.
伴你断断续续唱着歌. 假装没事了.
时间过了走了. 爱情面临选择.
你冷了却了我哭了.
一开始的不快乐. 你用卡片拭写着.
有些爱只给到这真的懂了.
怎麽了.你累了.说好的.幸福呐
我懂了.不说了.爱淡了.梦远了
开心与不开心.一一叙说着.你在不舍
那些爱过的感觉都太深刻.我都还记得
你不等了.说好的.幸福呐
我错了.泪干了.放手了后悔了
只是回忆的音乐盒还旋转着.要怎么停呐

怎麽了. 你累了. 说好的. 幸福呐.
我懂了. 不说了. 爱淡了. 梦淹了.
我都还记得.
你不等了.说好的.幸福呐
我错了.泪干了.放手了后悔了
只是回忆的音乐盒还旋转着.要怎么停呐 !

---------------------------------------------------------

This song is so sad...the promise...can't let people forget...
I like this sentence --> 只是回忆的音乐盒还旋转着. 要怎么停呐 --- sometimes its hard to forget..
but luckily my friend, Marvin told me, "cannot stop the music box mah take out the battery lor!" haha..thx..this remind me..anything also has its solution, just see how you find out and when you find out the key of the solution...So, Marvin and Piu..add oil..u guys just need time as well..there will be the way...(u know what i mean)!!!

I still have to praise JAY..my favourite singer..his song..meaningful and nice..!!!this song is recommended by me oh!!hehe...(definitely, many other of his fans or those who listened before! really...i saw their comments online)

给我一首歌的时间。。。

2008-10-12T02:07:00.000+08:00

Jay's new song: 女儿红 / 给我一首歌的时间

雨停下的天空. 灰的更加老旧.
你说你不懂为何在这时牵手.
我晒干了承诺. 灰的更加懵懂.
就算做事做错也只是怕错过
在一起走. 分开了走.
是不是说没有做完的梦最痛.
你若退后. 我能承受.
在最后的出口. 在爱过哪儿才有.
能不能给我一首歌的时间.
紧紧的把那拥抱变成永远.
在我的怀里. 不用太多失眠.
如果你想忘记我也能适应.
能不能给我一首歌的时间.
把故事听到最后才说再见.
你送我的眼泪. 让他留在雨天.
如果你怀疑一心的依然勇气当作鄙夷...

被淋湿的天空. 灰的更加老旧.
你说你不懂我为何在这时牵手
我晒干了承诺. 灰的狠冲动
就算做事做错也只是怕错过
在一起走. 分开了走.
是不是说没有做完的梦最痛.
你若退后. 我能承受.
在最后的出口. 在爱过哪儿才有.
能不能给我一首歌的时间.
紧紧的把那拥抱变成永远.
在我的怀里. 不用太多失眠.
如果你想忘记我也能适应.
能不能给我一首歌的时间.
把歌词听到最后再说再见.
你送我的眼泪. 让他留在雨天
.如果你怀疑一心的依然勇气当作鄙夷...

你说我不该不该不该在这时候说了我爱你.
要怎麽证明我没有说谎的力气.
请告诉我.而暂停算不算放弃.
我只有那一天的回忆...
能不能给我一首歌的时间.
紧紧的把那拥抱变成永远.
在我的怀里. 不用太多失眠.
如果你想忘记我也能适应.
能不能给我一首歌的时间.
哦.把歌词听到最后再说再见.
你送我的眼泪. 让他留在雨天.
哦.如果你怀疑一心的依然勇气当作鄙夷...

(rap)
你说过我不该.在这时说爱你.
要怎麽证明我没有力气.
可是暂停却算不算放弃.
我说我不该不该. 不该在这时才说爱你.
要怎麽证明我没有力气.
我只有一天回忆
---------------------------------------------------

**I duno whether the whole lyrics is 100% correct or not..coz the album haven't released, but going to...I'll update it when I know the correct lyrics...and the song's name as well...**

I like this song, because of its meaningful lyrics...have to grab the right timing...and appreciate...

"是不是说没有做完的梦最痛" ---
很多人都觉得/自然的认为，得不到的都是最好的！我也不例外。。偶尔，我也会这么想。。但，有位朋友告诉我，空想是没用的，不够的，真的爱一个人，是应该用行动来证明。如果真的爱一个人，就要好好地把握，不要让自己或对方留下遗憾！！加油。。。得不到的，也不要气馁，只是时机还没到，也许对的人，还没出现也不定。。如果真的认定了，无论多辛苦，都要把握！！！

London ExHaUsTeD trip...keke @.@

2008-10-08T04:36:00.000+08:00

Yesterday I was "exhausted"!!!

HAHA...yala..not so exaggerate lar..tired lor...Juz came back from London...was going to US embassy to interview, but failed d...

The trip was sooooo "messy"...I almost lost in London..I can't find the embassy..and I also almost lost when I wanna find the London China Town...

Now only I know cannot 100% fully trust the "G--gle map" coz I follow the map and its far away from the underground station I stopped by...Then I try to walked by myself without asking anyone..just following the map, even I know my "direction" always "very good" de...but I think the map is correct one, mah follow lor...then I really cannot find, and it's getting late already..no choice, I mah asked people there lor..I asked liao few..all also told me, it is far from where I am...I have to keep walking...and continue asked people...wa lau eh...

I walked liao around 15 minutes, I asked another girl and guy, then they said, I should take tube to another station, it will be nearer from where I am...That time almost 12.45pm already, my appointment was 1.30pm, its better to reach there b4 half an hour. Then I started to nervous liao, I straight away asked the taxi driver on the road side...he said can reach there 5 minutes, then I asked him to fetch me to the embassy...Finally, I reached there d..it's really fast..and no need 5 minutes like tat dah sampai, hv to pay 3.20 pounds...kelian~~

Then reach there already, I look at the building opposite the taxi, full of flags, British and US flags, I tot is the embassy, then I looked at the building like the face telling people "Finally I reached already!!!"..then itu taxi driver open the car window and told me, "The US embassy is in front that building, NOT this one!"..wa lau eh, so pai se...!!!then I said thank you and faster walked to THAT building lor...aiseh..@.@

There were many people line up there..the after went inside only know we still have to take number de, not like straight away can interview. And its interview, is FAR from my imagination..I thought will go inside a room or what to interview by the officer, but it is just like normal window booth, like we go bank counter...za dao!!!!!!!

then I have to wait around 200++ people only until my turn according to that number..I really crazy waiting there...so wu liao and sleepy...I waited until 4pm sth only called my number, then I went to the counter, not more than 5 minutes already kena reject...I also duno how to argue with him..saying I dun think that was a reason or what..I just said "oh...oh..oh!!!"

then I desperately wanna eat chinese food..thought of going to China Town can eat a chinese food before going to coach station coz the bus was 6.30pm depart...mana tau nearly 5pm already when I came out from the embassy, and I just sempat buy few breads from the Kowloon restaurant...then I have to rush back to the coach station before 6.30pm...whole day only rushing and find the correct direction..so hor..use many of my brain cells...hehehe...so I very tired lor..Lagi before I went to interview that nite, I cannot sleep ler...whole nite din sleep..until the early morning when I'm on the bus only I sleep... the guy sit beside me, he so sien...he wanna talked to me de..but i dun wan "choi" him, I just sleep oni..(tired mah)..then when i wake up a while, he quickly talked to me...aiyo..ask me where i go la..blah blah blah...then finish d..i continue sleep..hahahaha...second time oso like tis..then when i continue sleep..he talked to the aunties behind us...hehehehehe!!!

actually long story lar..but I am fine woh...so..for itu wang pau kit, no need feel sorry coz I m not getting the visa..also not ur fault, not u reject me de, ok?!! but, u can happy for one thing, at least now i won't bomb ur kitchen d mah..haha!!!

when I planning to back Malaysia ler..???hmm...still thinking...I planned to back after Halloween de..never experience before mah..but I lagi greedy now oh...I wish I can wait until November, hope I can see and feel the snow before I go back..I really wanna see snow ler..but duno it will snow so soon onot...aih...

UpDaTe NEWS!!!!!!

2008-10-03T00:23:00.000+08:00

*Paris*

Erm...long time din write a proper post...lazy d...

after my Europe trip, thought I will upload some photos and also describe a bit about the trip...but haha..long time d..okla..wait i got mood 1st lar...

Now i am living in Kensington, Liverpool..most of my friends, I think may be all also back to Malaysia already..I still have to wait for the US embassy interview to try to get US visa, so that I can go US to visit my sister..but if i fail to get the visa, no big deal for me..i will back Malaysia lor..actually quite miss Malaysia...as old people always said, "when you come out, only you know what is good and best for you!"..I think its true...i will remember my "messy" room with Jay's posters and my own bed, my naughty brother -- "botani", my fei fei d de big sis (coz always talk non-sense), my always serious and "loud speaker" de big brother, my US sis -- "google king", my dad, grandpa and grandma...always make me angry de mimi..also three 3 8 de cousins, my aunt...my Kajang friends, KTAR friends...

aih..if really wanna list out..a long list pulak...but here de weather hor..really getting cold d..now always windy and sometimes raining, then suddenly sunny day..but because of windy, it is very cold when I go out...the wind blow until my ears pain...so kesian...i think Malaysia wont be like tis..my friends that juz went back to Malaysia from here, complained Malaysia is too hot for them..haha....actually i very scare cold..duno after come here, got help me to build my immune system become stronger, so I wont scare cold when I go back to Malaysia...

I hope whole day I can sleep on the bed with two blankets cover me...ahhh...so cold...

today I wear 3 long sleeves when I went to city centre..but still cold when the wind blows..forget to bring my gloves..aiks..I must bring next time...my finger cold until hard to move...

Malaysia foods are waiting for me..i know...---nasi lemak, har mee, wat dan hor, fuk kin min, sushi king (i know is not malaysia food, but i love very much), my grandma's soup, my neighbour -- sam sou's chili, sambal, wangsa de hot and spicy mee, and so on so on...argh...air liur pun mau keluar..here mau makan hot food pun susah..especially with soup one..except I cook myself lor...but i came here liao, paling pandai de (after I learn and experience) is tom yam nasi goreng (lagi the tom yam taste is from the paste tat I baught..hehe) or normal nasi goreng oni...err..telur goreng, lagi ape arr...normal goreng sayur lor...yah..i say i wanna learn cook porridge..not yet try b4..mau try if got chance..

if i got chance go US, hehe..wang pau kit...ur kitchen..haha..is MINE..wahaha..then i everyday try new thing..bomb ur kitchen..haha..remember buy insurance woh..blek...!!!!!

-boring at home now...and raining outside..aih-

人，最可怕。。。

2008-09-19T23:44:00.000+08:00

很多人都以为，鬼很可怕。。可是，人，才是世界上最可怕的东西。。。

之前，我去过一个在 Liverpool 的博物馆，其中有一个部分，是展览很多野生动物。。我和朋友看到有一盒箱子，上面写着：“你敢打开吗？里面是世界上最恐怖的动物！”结果我们没有勇气打开，使那里的工作人员帮我们打开的，里面放着一面镜子。。

当一个人生气时，居然可以做或说出平时你预料不到的事情，而这些事情，也许对他来说不怎么样，可是却足以令人伤心，害怕。。。

“对不起”，也许已经不重要了，要怎么才能重拾之前的信任？！

在外地旅行，是很开心，大开眼界，至少在投入工作前放任自己去玩，你以为没有想家吗？你以为每件事情你都懂吗？你以为一定每天都很开心吗？听了你说那番话，更让我伤心，“你以为每个人好像你每天去旅行，走街。。？”

又说我想多了。。？你再仔细想想。。开心时，当然也有难过的时候！！！你又了解吗？

发现原来你以为很了解一个人的时候，其实并没有，因为人是善变的，你会更加伤心。。。

虽然外面天晴，但，心情却像突然来了暴风雨般的。。

FINISH EXAM...GrAdUaTe...

2008-08-29T20:01:00.000+08:00

finally...finally i finish this 3 months suffer..its really happy but at the mean time i feel upset as well..

*I took at lecture hall on the last lecture*

Happy = because I graduate already, no need to pressure and stress on study, no need read so many many articles and books...

Upset = because I am going to finish the study life and begin a new life..social working life, and I also will miss all my lecturers here..I very like them..they are so kind..all are very helpful...

*EVE and me*

previously, keep on countdown and wait today to arrive..finally this is the day..(29/8/08)..v finish our exam..i cry at school..after talked to my tutor..she is really great..tell me to be confidence a bit..thank you EVE!!! I also cry because I will be very miss NED..from the thesis until other assignments, he always guide me..I really hope after this, I can keep in touch with them...

*NED and me*

Also, I wont forget the helps that provided my sis in US and also her fren, Yuen...They also help me a lots, not only checking my essays grammar, sometimes oso give me some ideas on how to do the assignment and so on..REALLY..totally, 100%, truthfully very appreciate that supports, and because of all this support, I am able to finish my degree..which i have no regrets at all..I have try my best and I really can say that i put 101% of efforts on doing this summer programme..it was tough..because we are doing degree of 120 credits within 3 months, which normally takes one or three years to finish...

*ANDREW and me*

As our lecturers said, "You should proud of yourself!!!"..I will..thank you..

*ALAN and me*

ya..n yesterday i went to meet my lecturer, he was giving us feedback on our mini thesis..i am so happy..coz NED told me "Excellent, really a super good peice of work!!"..i happy until wanna fly...hehe..THANKS NED..i wanna said that I can have a good piece of work, also because of him...his guidance and patient..thank you..

All in all, I just wanna said, I AM SO HAPPY now..and later at nite will going to dinner at Adelphi Hotel and will have disco party there..then after finish..we will go clubbing..wahaha..finally free liao...!!!

I am sitting on the Big Brother's diary room chair...

2008-08-07T21:54:00.000+08:00

* Its stated on the double decker bus*

Yesterday, I was meeting with my tutor to ask about my assignment. Then I went back with my friend, Yan Qi...It is raining..and it is almost 4pm...Others had gone home after seminar early at 1.30pm...

It was so coincidence that we both finished meeting with our lecturer, we walked home together..We reached the city centre, it was still a bit raining, and we see the double decker bus..and the words "Big Brother"..Then we wonder what Big Brother doing here, some campaigns or what...Then we straight away walked to the people who queueing there.. One of the staff came and explained to us this is the Big Brother tour bus..Inside got Big Brother's diary room chair, we can took picture and its all free..

*The Chair*

End up..both of us queueing there as well..haha..coz is rainy day..so not much people queueing..but we waited and finish after 1 hour...

*Start Queueing*

After that, we get a Big Brother's pen, small badge and sweets. We not only get this goody, but we can watched many video inside the bus..its all those contestants who went to Big Brother audition...

*Goody*

At last, its our turn...We went to the second floor of the bus, the Chair is there..so nice and big...And they actually using Samsung mobile phone, which is 5 megapixel camera, (i duno what model) to took our picture..Then immediately they print out...the color was so nice..I think this Samsung campagin was very intersting and creative...We don't really know actually is Samsung promotion or what, but thought was the Big Brother...So its quite nice and surprising...

*This is the photo (i am using another camera to take, so its a bit blur)*

LFC outlet look look...and shop shop..hehe!!!

2008-07-27T07:15:00.000+08:00

*Liverpool Football Club logo, from the shopping bag..^.^*

Today went to city centre a while with Sharon.. I wanted to have a look at LFC outlet because they said they are having promotion for last season football jersey and shirts...My big sis lor, don't know why so into this football club...want me buy a sweater for her...So, me and Sharon went to Primark walk walk, coz she said wanted to buy short pants..At the end, she baught a shirt and so do I..erm..mine de is not shirt..kind of spaghetti strap...We also share baught the rubber band..

*buy at Primark -- 3 pounds*

*rubber band -- 1 pound, each of us get 12 rubber bands*

After Primark, we went to Tesco a while, because Sharon wanted to buy chicken and carrot to cook porridge for tonite dinner...Then only we went to LFC outlet...

I thought no more promotion or alrready finished those cheap jersey and shirts, because there is no any sign saying they have sales, and they are not place the promotion products near the entrance door but at the back...I wanted to go d, but luckily I walked around before go back...There are still many jerseys, but all is big big size..even I wanted to buy for my brothers also cannot...Surprisingly, there are jackets and sweaters...I was so happy coz its cheap...and its nice too...haha..then no need to think again how to find a LFC sweater for my sis..coz previously I came this outlet before..not cheap ler...40++ pounds for jersey, sweater also need 35++ pounds..now they have sales..

*Jacket that i baught -- 15 pounds*

*Sweater -- 10 pounds*

*another normal long sleeve shirt i baught -- 10 pounds
(but I guess I wanted to refund coz not so nice when i wear)*

So, I baught above 3 items from LFC outlet..I guess this is the 1st time I spend so much in one day..--38 pounds per day...hmm..but I still think the jacket and sweater very nice and reasonable, cheap price...hehe ^.^

*Besides, includes hanger for us oh..nice oh..red color with LFC logo*

*hehe..I shuang shuang try the jacket..really nice ler..*

Our Small Belle, HAPPY 22th BIRTHDAY!!! ^.^

2008-07-27T06:18:00.000+08:00

** Actually her birthday was on 24 July, but because I was busy with my assignment, no time to write post...I just finished the assignment that going to submit on Monday, just send to my 2nd sis to help me check grammar mistake...

Back to our story...hmm..SMALL BELLE...

This year, her birthday was very special, because we celebrated at Liverpool...so special and memorable...not everyone also got this chance de oh...But, may be she will feel a bit upset because she cannot celebrate her birthday with her "leaf" (ah yap)...hehe..

That day, after class, she went to meet our lecturers, so, such a coincidence where it give us opportunity to go and buy cake, no need think of stupid silly excuse not to go home with her...haha!!! Then, me, ah pen and Marcus went to Iceland buy a blackforrest cake..though it was not her favourite, there is no tiramisu and Marcus said Iceland's cake better than Tesco, so we only buy at Iceland.

** We noticed that cake at Liverpool really very CHEAP!!! Sorry to say that, but it's real, imagine that we can only buy a small small 0.5kg cake with around RM20, but here, with 3 pounds, we can buy a big cake around 1kg, I guess...

*Blackforest cake from Iceland..definitely, not included the big knife there..hehe*

After baught cake, I started to think how to give her surprise ler..hmm..I don't think she know we will celebrate with her that midnite, 12am...May be she will think we will celebrate with her on the day 24 July...hehehe..so, this called SURPRISE!!! hope she really feel it...

I am the one who responsible to distract her attention when others come into our house and stand by at kitchen around 11.50pm...However, I was very super tired...I fall asleep when I wanna take bath around 11pm...then suddenly I awake and look at the time...OH MY GOD!!! It's 11.45pm...It's the time that I should called Belle, and before that will need to call downstairs to prepare...Then ah pen called me already, she asked me already prepare to call or not, coz they all stand by d..I said, I will call her soon...After I prepared already, I asked them stand by to come up coz I am going to distract Belle attention..haha..I called her, asked her about Truman Show assignment...Then they give me signal, everything set..then almost 12am...I have to hang up...then I told her, "oklar..I try to do the assignment 1st.."

*We knock her door...see..leng c so happy there..eh..celebrate her birthday meh??!!*

I took my camera, prepared to capture a memorable video...then we knock her door, I ask her come out, she was shocked when saw us outside her room..haha.."MISSION ACCOMPLISHED"!!! Definitely, we sing her different language de birthday song...I surely continue to "record" video...Then, we waited her at kitchen coz she was talking with the "leaf", so give her some time lor...We took photos at kitchen...Then suddenly only I realize..DAMN!!! I forgot to press the RECORD BUTTON!!!!!!!!!!! it's EXASPERATED!!!!! @.@

**This story tell us, before birthday celebration, avoid fall asleep because it will make you BLUR...I m sorry, Belle!!!

*all girls take photos (when belle msn chatting with the "leaf"*

Overall, even all of us were rushing and doing our assignment, we still enjoy this small birthday celebration...It was just a simple celebration..Hope she don't mind, because we also didn't prepared any present...aiks...SORRY again..~.~

*our group photos---including Marcus*

H-A-P-P-Y B-I-R-T-H-D-A-Y !!!!!!!!!!!!

**a small note to SMALL BELLE: even I always feel stressed and blur in those assignments, not like last time in TARC, now I always cannot help you, because me myself also blur sometimes...Hope you won't mind..but if you have any problem, you still can find me...I will try my best to answer you if i know... CHEERS... we are tough..we can handle until finish this degree de..!!! ALL OF US, Broadcasting students...!!!ADD OIL... ^.^

~SATISFY~ with buying foods...especially my BISCUITS..

2008-07-22T01:08:00.000+08:00

Today get back one of my previous assignment result, erm..my mark was in the middle lor..not very good..but not very bad..i hope i can do well in following all the assignments..still have one month ++ left...then i will be FREE from study pressure...dun wish to study already...(but may be later after work, i will said i miss study??!! who knows?!)

So, after we get back our results, we went to shopping..hehe..not for dress but FOOD...we went to 99p shop, buy biscuits..I wanna buy McVities biscuit...but no more d..Terpaksa, i have to buy other biscuits lor..i buy liao many things today..semuanya FOOD..wahaha..to satisfy myself...because my biscuits no more already..feel unsecure without biscuits in my drawer... ^.^

*drawer 1*

Very tired, yesterday 3am sth only sleep...After I reach home, however, I arrange my biscuits 1st..haha...so now, my 2 drawers are full of biscuits and other food...haha..won't famine for this week..i guess..

*drawer 2*

** I really very love to eat biscuits...thats why my biscuits very fast finish...aih..!!!!! So, for those who read this and is "SMART" enough...should know what to do lar...if don't know..i can suggest here...you can send some biscuits or cookies to me..haha..to re-charge my losing power in facing pressure...!!! hehehe...**

NEXT summer sales...19 July 08

2008-07-19T18:14:00.000+08:00

today..Next shop start summer sales from 5am...My God..didn't go shopping before in such an early time...me and my friends go at 5.45am..Before we reach there, we already saw many people with their shopping bags..each of them at least hold 2 shopping bags...It is just 6am only, they already finish shopping and going back...Can you imagine how 'effective and efficient' this customers are??

It's all products is half price...but we cannot try, we just allowed to buy already, if not suitable then we can refund or change other items...I baught 2 jeans short skirts, costs 8 pounds and 5 pounds..I want to return the 5 pounds one, coz is loose and not so nice...I wanted to buy the gaun..is nice..and 15 pounds only..but cannot try, so i give up and put it back... ~.~

*after finish shopping, but i JUST baught 2 skirts only (1 going to refund)*

Such an early morning shopping...its fresh..but when I walking to the store, I feel like a bit fainted..May be coz I still feel sleepy...Man, just 6am we went to shopping already..Malaysia won't have these kind of chance...never experience before..Some more is so windy outside..I wear my pink wind resistant jacket and wear 2 long sleeves inside..can you imagine..?!! I should wear spaghetti inside, then I can simply try those t-shirt or gaun... @.@

North Wales and Llandudno trip (17 July 08)... fun? boring?

2008-07-19T00:06:00.000+08:00

* In the bus, take pic with Alan..*

Well, yesterday (rainy day) we were going to a social trip, to North Wales and Llandudno, with two lecturers, Iqbal and Alan. Before the day, I was wondering, wanna go or not, because I haven't start to do my assignment which going to submit on Monday, keep worrying...But Iqbal said, "Come lar, relax one day, later you don't complaint too stress then fainted or what..." At last, I decide go together with my friends, because may be after this, we seldom have the chance to go out / trip together..I wonder??!!

So, Iqbal told us, we will need 1 hours like that to reach North Wales. Who knows, we almost 2 hours only reach there. This is not the point, the point is, we are sitting on the double-decker bus, and the bus is not like very new (if compare with the 1st time social trip to Chester), so its kind of fainted and 2 of my friends feel like want to vomit. I also felt headache... @.@

*North Wales*

Finally, we reach our destination...There were other tourists there...It's actually kind of small villages, with shops and its fresh environment with many trees and flowers...But, we reach there late already, so we just have around one and a half hour to visit the place, its not so details and not going to every single place to visit...

Don't know is due to the raining of this morning, feel like very very super cold there...even wear jacket also feel cold..and because of the weather looks like clowdy..so, my mood also follow the weather, not enjoy at all..I just feel cold and like don't wish and not interested to visit that place... ~.~

*Llandudno*

After that, we went to the 2nd destination...Iqbal said, bring us to visit castle previously..and we all so excited and looking forward to go into the castle to take many photos..but..when we reach there...its like a new town..don't feel there have any castle..

*Iqbal-our Programme Leader..-he claimed he is the "best P.L"..hehe*

Iqbal said he also don't know..then we walk to the seaside which near Llandudno...Luckily there have sea and can keep pur mouth shut, and stop complaining Iqbal bluff us (don't have castle)...So cold, happy and relax when we reach the seaside..but we just can stop by there for 1 hour only..

*Seaside*

*my housemates---Marybone Flat 39 residents..^.^*

We keep on take pictures when we reach there...then I collect 6 stones from there...The stones here very nice, because its colourful...(but may be is so many there only can shows it beautiful side of the stones)...Then after that, when we going back only heard people said there are castles here, but don't know where and its at least 5 miles away..(is it far?)

As a conclusion of this trip, not as our expectation, and I have to rush my assignment now..monday due date..

## I am not free de, but reading until bored already only come and post something...blek!!!

~fire engine~

2008-07-15T20:59:00.000+08:00

Yesterday nite (14 July 2008, 9.30pm++), when i want to continue discussed presentation assignment with my partner after dinner..suddenly, the fire alarm rang...very loud...we and her other housemates thinking whether its just a testing alarm or what..but, this time rang quite long...so, we think there is something wrong, so we decided to go down, not to stay in the hostel.

Then, there are many people starting walking down using staircase...i am leaving at 9th floor, doing assignment at 8th floor, not much different, also have to walk a long way down...

The funny thing is, some of them still asking, wanna bring what, wanna bring psasport, the funniest one is.."I haven't bring my jacket!"..HAHAHAHAHA..its like if really a serious fire happen, do you still thinking of this kind of things? sure leave the building immediately...I told them: "if it's really a serious fire, i guess we all sure stuck in the fire because even when we walking down from 8th floor with staircase, we are like very relax..walk like nth happen..haha

When we reach down there, heard other students said that one of the house at 10th floor, their kitchen are fired...but we didn't see any smoke come out from their window...Then, Liverpool fire engine very efficient and fast reach our hostel..and there were 3 fire engines...hahaha..like very serious only..but actually just a small matter...after a while, we can go back already..but..we have to climb back to 8th floor to continue discussion...

**if any of the person that I indicate above, pls don't take it serious, I just feel funny and share with others only..NO OFFENCE!!!hehehehehe.............

AFTER presententation...still cannot rest...

2008-07-15T20:37:00.000+08:00

Finally finish Media Business Presentation..even though its just 15 minutes of presentation, the preparation is not easy. Me and my partner have to prepare slide shows, hand out, and how we opposed each other points and give feedback to each other...yesterday we finish discussed, rehearsal and everything around 3.30am, then only sleep around 3 hours until today 6.30am need to wake up again...soooo BUSY...and tired..the funny thing is..when i shower, i can't even open my eyes, so pain and heavy...

So, me and my partner is quite satisfied with our own presentation and performance...but, don't know how our lecturers think about that...but, we don't really bother, as long as we finish present, we have to focus on tomorrow works...aih..

tomorrow, i have to meet my Mass Comm Project (mini thesis) supervisor and tell him how is my progression of my work and so on...have to show him what have i read or done...i haven't finish read my readings, so have to continue later...And not only this project readings, tomorrow lecture readings oso haven't touch..AND next monday have to submit another assignment regarding Film Noir...OH GOD...!!!Give me a break...can i sleep for whole week..without doing other things, especially readings and assignment..??!!

**Thanks for ah pen de "Fruitful Shredded Wheat"...I am eating for my lunch...

My NEW Blog...^.^

2008-07-14T13:33:00.000+08:00

Hi everyone,

I just created this blog...Well, nothing..just feels like need a space for me to express myself..stress, pressure, disgusting, happy, sadness and so on...

Anyway, as the blog theme is *World of Expression*..So, do feel free to leave a comment, anything, whether is good or bad...

Thanks...Enjoy ya..!!!

Bean sprout and iceberg dinner...~.~

2008-07-14T05:45:00.000+08:00

Tonite dinner such a healthy vege dinner...I never eat like this before..I cooked bean sprouts with iceberg...I just ate like that...It is delicious at first, but later...oh my god..the feelings of disgusting appeared...tooooooo much of bean sprouts...if it is serve with rice, it might be no problem...but...

I am not keep fit or want to save money...It is because Friday, my friend's dad baught us a big bag or bean sprouts...So, I guess this few days we still have to eat bean sprouts as one of our dishes...

*Yah, "our" here is means me and my housemates...I am staying in Liverpool now, for few months only, taking my degree...

Today is quite cold even is summer now, I wish to eat hot foods at Malaysia..Miss Malaysian food so much...Penang Har Mee, Spicy noodles, nasi lemak, soups, SUSHI, chicken wing, mushroom soup at Pizza Hut...ohhhhhh!!!!!

*A bit hungry even just ate my 'vege' dinner two hours ago... ~.~

*World of Expression*

我♥大自然 *^_^*